If Only We Could See
by Halo-Less-Angel
Summary: "Don't touch anything." "Why not?" "Because I said not to." "That's exactly why I'll do it anyway." - There were too many things wrong with her to see the good things. Or so they thought. Contains OC. Don't like, don't read. KakaOC. T for strong language
1. Chapter 1: Strawberry PopTarts!

**An: Well****... this is my first story on this sight... as of right now, there isn't a definate pairing... but you can vote and tell me if you'd prefer... Itachi x the OC, or Kakashi x the OC. For those reasons... there will be no age spoken of! :)**

**Warning:  
>This story is rated a <strong>_strong _**T because... well, there's ALOT of language... don't say I didn't warn you!**

**Disclaimer:  
>I tried to buy Naruto off some guy on my corner street... he told me to go away or he'd bust a cap in my head... So I left.<strong>

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><p>The only thing on my mind at the moment, was how much I hated strawberry Poptarts. Honestly, I don't know how people could actually like anything strawberry flavored... Or maybe it was just me and as my mom liked to say, my 'odd taste'.<p>

At one time, I liked strawberry flavored things... a very long time ago. But then at a family reunion, there was a strawberry Oreo eating contest... I had won... but also ended up retching into a garbage pale for the rest of the day... I felt truly sorry for the people that had to clean that up...  
>And so... Here I was, locked in a vicious death glaring battle with... the box of strawberry Poptarts in my cupboard. Why were they there if I hated them so? My parents loved them. And they loved my reactions to the horrible snackbreakfast... thing. That's right, thing, it doesn't even deserve a word to be called.

What really ticked me off... my parents went on a six month cruise, without me, and left this... thing behind to annoy me. Well parents, I wonder how strawberry scented flames will smell... and now the evil box is sitting in my fire pit outside. I had disposed of the wrappers, just to be safe...  
>But now I was feeling sick to my stomach. So I decided the only way to right this horrible wrong bestowed upon me, was to go to the nearest 711, and buy the first box of chocolate fudge Poptarts I saw. And that's exactly what I plan to do.

It was about three in the afternoon, and the streets were crowded with teens, why? I don't know. I'm not sure I want to either, because I smell pot, and other things I don't want to. After finally leaving my infested block, I turned right and made my way up the six blocks that would lead me to the 7/11.

Finally getting inside, I smiled at the clerk who knew me very well... every day, sixth period, I'd leave school and come here for a slurpy, and a small tray of nacho's. Why? Well, I didn't feel like sitting in an Italian class when I was already fluent in the language, and passed the exams with high ninety's, flunking the class with a fifty for never showing up.

"Naiomi, nice to see you! What can I do for you?" The flirty, college freshman winked, scratching the scruff of his face.

"I need chocolate fudge Poptarts. I hate strawberry..." I grumbled, walking into the isle, grabbing a box and heading to the counter. Slapping a some yen on the counter, I held out my pointer and middle finger, "Ja ne!" and made my way back out of the store.

Smiling victoriously, I didn't realize I was walking in the middle of the street, nor did I realize the car that was coming my way... When the horn blared, I looked up... "Well shit..." I whispered, just before the car plowed into me.

The last thing I remembered was sirens blaring, some lady running out of the car to me, and the horrible pain in the back of my skull...

Had someone decided to hit me with a box truck? Because that's definitely what it feels like. I opened my eyes and was met with a blinding white light, and a few people. Odd looking people... A blonde lady was at my side, stroking my head. She had pretty brown eyes, and a gentle smile was on her face.

Looking down at my arm, I saw that there was an I.v. drip in it and my eyes widened. "FUCK!" I screamed, grabbing and ripping it out, making my arm start gushing blood.

A pink haired girl ran forward and grabbed my elbow. Her hand started... glowing green, and my eyes bugged out. She put the glowing hand over where I'd ripped the I.v. out, and I felt a sickening tug at my skin.

When her hand pulled away, there was no cut... just blood... that the blonde lady whipped away... "Okay... okay, don't freak out... don't freak out... fuck that, WHERE AM I!" I exclaimed, scooting away from the two women at my side and pulling the oxygen line out of my nose.

"You're in Konaha... The Hidden Leaf of the Fire Country..." The blonde seemed slightly worried. She felt my forehead and I scowled, slapping her hand away lightly. Then, the first thing that came to mind was...

"Where are my Poptarts?"

They all eyed me peculiarly, and I'm not ashamed to say this wasn't the first time I'd been looked at like that... by random people whom I don't know. The silver haired man looked at me oddly and said from behind his... mask thing, "Your what?"

"Poptarts... You know, the box I ended up in this place... with..." I scratched my head, wondering how I ended up in this Konaha anyway... I felt confused... like the time my mom hit me with a wooden spoon that was steaming and said, "Life lesson of Jesus, when something's steaming, it's either hot or cold, but both ways it's extremely pissed off."

"Pop...Tart?" The blonde with whisker like things... on his cheeks. He was actually kind of adorable. Kind of made me wish I had a little brother.

"Mhmm..." I rubbed my nose.

"Where are you from? More importantly, what's your name?" The blonde in front of me asked.  
>"My names Naiomi... Watanabe... What's your's?" I looked at the blonde who'd asked me and she smiled.<p>

"My name is Tsunade Senju. I am the Hokage of Hidden Leaf." She patted my head before continuing with her questioning. "Where are you from Naiomi-Chan?"

I unconsciously allowed my eyes to widen... no one had added the honorific onto my last name sense I visited Hong Kong last summer to see my fathers family... "Well... I lived in Okinawa for a while but a few months ago I moved to Tokyo..."

"Ah... what country are those in?" She had a suspicious look in her eyes now. I felt slightly self conscious because now everyone was looking at me like I had two heads...

"Maa, why are you all looking at me like that? It isn't from your country of Fire... Okinawa was a country of it's own, and Tokyo is in Japan... You've never heard of those two? Okinawa isn't a surprise but... Tokyo?" I looked around at them. Now that I think about it, the blonde boy was a little familiar... okay, alot familiar... why couldn't I place a name that was on the tip of my tong to his face!

"Did you... hit your head when you fell Nee-Chan?" The blonde boy asked, looking at me oddly. 'Kuso! I know his name, what the hell is it!

"Fell? What are you talking about, I got hit... by something... I was in the street and... oh... oh my... Kami... I got hit by a car... I'm dead! Oh my fucking Catholic God I'm DEAD?" I grabbed the lady and pressed my forehead to hers, and then I was against the wall, two weird ass looking mo-fudgers in front of me, poised to kill. "What the fuck?... Where the hell did they pull you out of, some deranged costume party? If you go around throwing people, someone is gonna kick your ass!"

They looked oddly at me, then one of them dropped to the floor, screaming in pain as I glared at him. I stopped and looked at him in shock instead... "Are you... dancing?" I asked looking at him oddly, but he back away from me in fear...

"Demon! Monster! I looked in her eyes and it felt like I was in a pit of fire!" He then cowered behind the Hokage, who looked at me in shock. It seemed like everyone was looking at me like that.

"Fuck you too ass whole, I didn't do anything!" I snarled glaring at him... once again he hit the floor, almost like stop, drop, and roll style, only screaming.

"Enough!" The blonde exclaimed and I looked at her, she looked into my eyes with a stern gaze. "I don't know what it is you're playing at..."

"I don't either! I'm fucking DEAD for Kami's sake! And they threw me into this fucking HELL HOLE because I burned those strawberry poptarts... FUCK!" I punched the wall and it cracked, not hurting my hand at all. I stared at it in shock. "What the... I'm so confused..." I rubbed my face... "I burnt the poptarts, went to get a different flavor, and when I was walking, I... I was in the middle of the road and there was a car... but they couldn't stop... and... and it... it hit me... I'm- I'm dead... fuck... my mom is going to be so mad, I didn't do my laundry..."

By now, those all-too-familiar stares were going again and I looked down at my hands. "Whose gonna feed Mufasa now? Mom and Dad are on that cruise ship for the next two weeks... and I had a Science exam tomorrow!"

"Naiomi... tell me... in detail, what happened..." Tsunade-Sama walked over to me, holding up her hand to the silver haired guy and ugly fucker.

"I was in my house in Tokyo, and my parents left these strawberry Poptarts in my cupboard, and I-I hate strawberry poptarts, so I b-burnt them in the fire pit out back!" By now I had tears pouring down my face... "Then I decided I was still hungry so I went to the 7/11 a couple blocks down and bought chocolate fudge ones, and then I was walking back home, and I wasn't paying attention, and, and, now I'm DEAD! My dog is gonna starve, mom is gonna be so upset, and dad is gonna beat that guy to a pulp on the corner because he's gonna snap and- and I'm dead!"

She eyed me cautiously, but gathered me into her arms as I started crying. "My dog is gonna die!" My sobs weren't held back, and I was shaking.

Slowly but surely, I felt things melt away, and I realized... it was all over


	2. Chapter 2: Moving In!

**A/N: I tried to meet requests and cut down on the language... but there is still SOME! :)Thank you for the review. :D it made me smile!**

**Now, I apologise for the long wait and errors...**

**I NEED A BETA! D: Please P.M. me if you're willing!**

**And second to last, I didn't get to edit this chapter... please, expect and be patient with any errors you come across, I'm not perfect!**

**Last... I don't Own Naruto. I tried to buy it from Pein, but he tried to kill me so... I left.**

**ENJOY!**

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><p>Have you ever stared at the sun, and when you look away, everything has a bright glow on it? It hurts like a mother, but it's so pretty, the pain is worth it. That's what I was doing now, listening to Tsunade talk to the council about my... 'situation'.<p>

I was sitting on the floor, my legs crossed, when I felt someone glaring into the side of my face. I smiled when I turned and saw it was the Anbu person... thingy, that I 'harmed' earlier. I didn't do diddly _squat_.

"So you're saying... she looked at you and you felt like you were thrown into a pit of fire...?" An older man asked, eye brow raised peculiarly. You go old man, tell 'em he's crazy!

"Yes Sensei." The Anbu nodded. The council memebers looked at me, all blank looks on their faces while Tsunade smiled softly at me.

"If this is the truth... she could be useful to us." I raised an eye brow at the old geezer who said this. At the rate they were moving along with me, the only thing I'd be helping them with is expanding their vocabulary... and not in the good way.

"Hann-Sama, I doubt a young, imature girl could be of use to us." An older... okay _ancient _person snapped. Apparently... when this 'pain doseage' as we called it happened, my eyes would flash black and then the person would be screaming under my gaze...

I resisted the urge to glare at the old man as my fists quivered. And then, Tsunade came to my rescue. "Are you calling _me _a liar? I saw it with my own _eyes_. This young lady could be very helpful to us!" Her hands slammed into the table with rage.

I looked at her where she was absolutely seething in anger, looking around the room, daring _someone_ to object. "Uh... Tsunade-Sama..." All eyes turned to me and the old bag glared.

"Do not speak out of term!" He roared at me and I cocked an eye brow.

"I can see where _your _stress lines came from." The whole room went silent in shock. I smirked and gazed into the old mans eyes, who was absolutely about to have me killed... but I was already dead, so it's all good.

"Did... did you just... INSULT ME?" He bellowed, making everyone wince.

"Nope." I smiled cheekily. "I tell it how it is Pops."

"This... this is an OUTRAGE!" He stood up and glared at me. "Do you think your tough? Hmm? I have hundred's of Anbu members who'd kill you on the spot!"

"Dude... I'm already _dead_, go ahead, knock yourself out. How else would I end up in this hell hole. No, cartoon. Naruto, pshh. What's next, Dragon Ball Z?" I snorted and rolled my eyes, before fixing the member from before with a stony glare. Cue the screams coming from him as he fell to the floor.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "I love doing that to him!"

Now I was being eyed in shock. Murmurs flooded the room, and now the same member from before rose. "We'll accept her into the village. But she is to be monitored at all times."

"Hey, I'm not a baby!" I exclaimed. Folding my arms away under my chest. Then what he'd said really hit me. "Wait, what?"

"And, she must become a Konaha Ninja. The other members agree with me, though her attitude is horrible-"

"Hey!-"

"-We can look past that, work on it, and turn her into a fine shinobi of the leaf." He nodded and Tsunade smiled. Meanwhile, there was a whoop from outside, and then a few, 'itai, itai, itai!''s close behind.

"Whose there?" The door opened and in came the Kyuubi, Uchiha, and the girl named Sakura. A sheepish teacher behind them.

The Hokage laughed lightly, then took up a different matter of concern. "Now, as to where she'll be staying... it's safe to assume you'll need help getting situated?"

"Yeah..." I reached into my back pocked and pulled out my wollet. I kept all my Yen on my person because... you never know... and yeah... I just liked walking around with a big wad of money in my pocket.

I pulled out the thick wod and flipped through it... "Just point me to an area..."

"Independant?" Tsunade-sama seemed impressed.

I thought of how I made this money... "You can say that." Grimly I nodded, feeling ashamed.

I wasn't an angel, and for all what I loved, who ever was sitting up in the sky controling everything, just loved to torture me.

"C'mon you old fart! Help me get this bed into the appartment!" I shouted at the silver haired male who was lazily watching me. Earlier, in an attempt to get him to help me, I tricked him into thinking the next 'Icha Icha' was out... and stole the one he was reading. It was now tucked nicely into my bra, and I could see he was trying to think of a way to get it without me shouting pervert.

"Give me my book." He said simply. I rolled my eyes. Did he think I was stupid enough to falll for that?

"Help me get this into my appartment, and then I'll give you your book back." I replied. It's been about a week, and I was tired of sleeping on the floor mat. I wanted a real bed dammit!

"No." He replied.

"Fine. I'll introduce Mr. Book, to Mr. Swirly then." I smirked and walked around the bed box that was in my appartment buildings door, towards the wooden door. I opened it with the key and smiled. Things were cheaper here, and I had a surplus of money to blow... so now my appartment was quite cozy.

There was a coffee` table and a nice couch set, with a few paper lamps hanging from the ceiling. Under the coffee` table was a nice rug with the Japanese symbol for love on it. The kitchen had a nice counter and oil stove a sink included. There was a large window with a balcony which could be acessed by the door on the far right side of the wall. Walking to the left, there was a door way which was covered with a thin paper door. It led to a long hall with four doors. The first door on the right was a bathroom, and the other three were bedrooms.

Walking into the bathroom, I pulled the book from my bra, and Kakashi was hot on my trail. "What are you doing?"

"Shut up or I'll put it in my pants next." I snapped and walked to the toilet, opening the lid. "Help me bring my bed in, or the book gets it."

His only visible eye widened drasticly, then narrowed. "You wouldn't..."

I inspected my nails with a smug grin. "Would I?"

Looking at me through narrowed eyes, he debated quickly in his head, then he was gone from sight. A bewildered (I totally love that word, but I never get to use it...) look crossed my face as I looked around for the ninja.

"DAMN NINJA'S AND THEIR FUNKY DISSAPPEARING ABILITIES!" I stomped my foot and went to go outside and drag my bed up here, but the room across from the bathroom was open, my room tobe prescise, and Kakashi was there with Naruto and Sasuke.

"Tsunade-Baa-Chan gave us a mission... we have to help you move in." Naruto grinned. "Then you can treat us all to Ramen!"

"Sure. Sounds great. Don't break that, or I'll make you regret it, like that funny faced guy who was an Anbu or whatever..." I waved it off and went in search of Sakura. She could help me pick out plants... "Sakura-Chan!" I called.

"Hai? Ohayo Naiomi-Chan! What can I help you with?" She was organising my kitchen, a grin on her medical-ninja face.

"Do you want to come to the plant nursary with me and help me pick out some plants to decorate?" I asked, putting a pot into the correct cupboard.

"Sure!" She smiled.

"DON'T BURN MY HOUSE DOWN! 'KAY, THANKS, BE BACK SOON, SAKURA'S WITH ME!" Then, -slam-

"YOU'RE LEAVING ME HERE WITH THESE TWO?" Naruto exclaimed, a hurt voice.

"WE'LL BE BACK SOON!" Then we left.

"So, what type of plant are you looking for?" Sakura smiled at me and I tapped my chin.

"My Oji-Chan owned a Bonsai store in Okinawa... so I suppose Icanget a few Bonsai trees. That third room is perfect! There's just enough lighting, ne?" I grinned down at the younger girl.

"Sounds great! Ne, Omi Nee-Chan, how old are you?" She squinted up at me.

"Heh... I'm twenty-two... but I was still in schooling where I'm from. I don't know why, I should have just moved back to Okinawa and helped out with the shop like I wanted to, but I guess things went a little... out of order." I scratched my nose, a habit of mine that I got from my grandma. "Things never do go as planned for me though..."

"Ah... I thought you were younger!" She laughed, seeming shocked.

"I'm... immature for my age." I grinned. "But I don't plan on growing up. Staying childish on the inside... makes all the bad things on the outside easier to ignore."

She looked up at me in shock. "Hold onto that Sakura. Don't let others take you down. Use them as stepping stones and do what _you _need to. Take a risk every now and then, it's good for you." I winked.

"HEY! FOREHEAD!" Sakura seemed to get her feathers ruffled by this loud mouthed blonde girl.

"HEY, LOUD MOUTH!" I shouted back, giving her a dirty look. I saw her work smock and grinned evilly. "You work here, huh?"

She scowled and my grin grew more. "Can you show me to the Bonsai tree's?"

"Hmph." And she walked away.

"Very well. I'll just look for seeds and fend for myself." I saluted the brat and walked to the vast display of seeds. "Ne, Sakura-Chan, grab a basket will you?"

She nodded, breaking away from her glaring match with the blonde to grab a small wooden basket.

I grabbed a few of the Juniper Bonsai packets, and placed them into the basket. Then, the chickens head got cut off and chaos occured.

"HE'S MINE!" The blonde screamed, and Sakura blew up.

"NO HE ISN'T!" The pink haired girl shotback.

"FOREHEAD!"

"INO-PIG!"

"LITTLE BITCH!" I screamed, pushing Sakura behind me. "If I glare at you, you will go down. I fucking promise you. Turn your shrimp ass around and walk the other way! Chicken butt obviously has the hots for Naruto."

Then I went back to my shopping, multiple eyes on me. I picked up a pot and smiled. Grabbing a few more, I threw a bag of soil over my shoulder.

I grabbed pruners and bonsai wire, as well as a baby bonsai tree to start with. That's when the other three came in, looking a little bruised up. Well, the younger two anyway.

"Just the people I wanted to see!" I grinned.

Then there was barking... familiar barking... "MUFASA!" I forced all the stuff on Kakashi and ran out into the middle of the street. My big, love-able, mutt was sitting in the street, half the size of the dog he was growling at.

"HEY! MUFASA, DOWN PUPPY!"

When I went to run, I tripped... or was tackled... by Mufasa. He licked my face happily, tail wagging on his bull mastif behind...

"My baby!" I laughed, hugging him. "Now I'm not alone with the crazies!"

"Us? Were crazy?" I looked back at Kakashi.

"The threat of a swirly to the life of your perverted book which is still down my shirt is still intact." My dead pan drew us to narrowed eyes.

"You wouldn't."

"Would I?"

"No."

"Yes."

"You lie..."

"I do no such thing."

"You do."

"No. _You _do."

"You won't."

"If you fear for your life you'll be quiet. Mufasa here is an attack dog. Mufasa, get him." Said dog _grinned_, tackled the Ninja, and started licking his face. "I win."

After about ten minutes, I called Mufasa off, and Kakashi poofed into nothing... "What the hell?"

"Boo."

"WHOLEY SHIT ON A SANDWICH!" I screamed, jumping and hiding behind Naruto.

"You need to get out more often..."

"Yesh... Yesh I do."


	3. Chapter 3:Meeting Guy!

**A/N: Keep going I shall! Thanks for the review! A bit of humor for you below...**

**Warning!: Near the end there's... somewhat of a sexual situation. Nothing to bad kiddies! Don't gotta run to your mommy's yet!**

**Disclaimer: Once again, I tried to purchase Naruto from Itachi. He put me in his world thingy, and I was being followed by Kisame and Zetsu into the woods... for seventy two hours. When I woke up... he was gone. Damn weasle. I WILL GET YOU ITACHI UCHIHA!**

**Itachi: Hmm?**

**Me: *SQUEE* AHHHH! *glomps Itachi***

**Sasuke: *Twitching* Must... kill... brother...**

**Me: Uh oh... uh... I'M NOT THE CREATOR! HEAD TO THE HILLS MUFASA!**

**Mufasa: WOOF!**

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><p>I never got along well with other kids growing up. I didn't like sharing... Candy, toys, pets, If I had it, you name it, if I had it, then I didn't share it.<p>

And worse? When the, 'You have to share, or I'll tell your mommy!' came around, I'd end up laughing, and my little fist ended up in some innocent kids face... all because they wanted me to share. Call me greedy. I agree.

Mom would scold me for it, dad would laugh and ask how much they bled, and grandpa would start preaching about how violence solves every problem. And we all know, what grandpa says, goes. 'Never disobey the Grampster' He'd say... damn right I didn't.

"C'MON NEE-CHAN! IT'S JUST ONE NOODLE!" Poor Naruto didn't know my phobia of sharing...

What did Sasuke do? "Hn. Idiot." He cave-manned.

"MINE!" I screeched. I figured, punching a Ninja wouldn't be a very smart thing to do... so I did the next best thing and Gibbs-Slapped him. I totally watch NCIS. "And Chika, if you continue to speak cave-man and I'll burn all your cloths and have a bon-fire, replace your body wash with super-grow for hair, and leave you with a skirt thingy."

"Uchiha." Kakashi corrected as Sakura giggled, Naruto rubbed his Gibbs-Slapped head, and Sasuke glared.

"I'm only saying this one more time Hatake. Your book, _will _die." Yes, I still have his book. His pervy, boobie covered book.

I recieved a, "Hn." in response. I finished up my noodles with a _slurp_, right in Naruto's face, and then we proceeded to leave.

"Great, now we have two cavemen! Not one, _two_! Peachy-dee!" I threw my hands into the air and walked a bit ahead of everyone. Right into a wall. Sighing, I patted it. "You're an odd wall, ain'tcha'? Poppin' up outta no where, hittin' me in the face... That's okay though, I know a therapist, his name is Mr. Stop Sign, he walked into me too. He can help you with your problem."

"Why, Beautiful Flower, I am no wall! I am Konoha's very own Beautiful Green Beast! I bring joy to all with my youthfulness!" I looked up at the very person I'd been dying to meet... for the past three days I've had Kakashi's book. Together, we'd drive Kakashi up Miss. Wall! Who knows, maybe they'd fall in love, and have little Hatake walls...

"YOU! I have a proposition of extreme youthful...ness. With this book!-" I ripped Kakashi's book from my shirt, catching said masked man's widening eye. "We shall challenge Hatake Kakashi in a series of physical youthfullness!"

The B.G.B (Beautiful Green Beast) flashed a grin, taking the book. "I like the way your youthful mind thinks, Flower!"

"YATTA! Come to the dark side kiddies! We're bakin' _cookies. _And if you don't I'll use my eye thing-y which I now dub the True Evil Eye! T-E-E for short..." I grinned at them. Cookies was enough to convince Naruto, but when my eyes were brought up, Sakura and Sasuke quickly made their way over.

"You're evil. A horribly, horribly, _horribly_ evil girl." Hatake glared at me and I winked.

"MUFASA! We have cookies and schemes to bake! Mush! Team's Guy and Kakashi, righteo-cheerio's, let's go!" I pointed dramatically and made my way back to my appartment.

"Guy-Sensei... where are we going?" The weird white eye'd guy asked... I now call him bug eyes. Heh, catchy...

"To this Flowers home, where we withh bake cookies and schemes to test my eternal rival Kakashi's youthful physical capeability! Let's go!" Team Guy, excluding Lee, sighed, rubbing their head.

"YES GUY-SENSEI!" If you don't know who said that, then shall you be stoned and dragged via chariot through the Roman streets naked... JUST KIDDING! But I won't tell you if you don't know...

**#&*&%#* Some colorful language later... *#%&*&#**

"Jeeze, you people are boring. Your freakin' ninja's, get up and dance or something! Maa, chicken butt, keep glaring at me and I'll expose your secret crush on Naru-Kun." All eyes were on C.B (Chicken Butt aka. Sasuke), whose face was red hot and very angry.

"I DO NO-"

"I AM _NOT_ A FREAKY FISH GUY!" I shouted before he finished, fixing him with a stern gaze. I got an odd look from most people. Key word being most people... wait, that's two words...

"Your youthful humor is very amusing flower." Guy chuckled.

"Haha... yeah... youthful humor..." I rolled my eyes. Humor my ass. "Hey, am I makin' chocolate chip or gingerbread...? I know it isn't Christmas, but... you gotta love gingerbread men in floral pattern... It's like... a mini Vay-Kay for gingerbread men... then they get eaten." That's when Kakashi came in, bored look on his face.

But then... his eye locked on his book, which was hanging out of my backpocket.

All it took was a blink, and the nut job was wrestling with my torture buddy trying to get to me! Damn ninja's and their pervy obsessive compulsive reading habits...

Hm... what did my mom do when I got into fights with my cousins...? "AHA!" I ran to the closet, grabbing the broom, the proceeded to whack them with it, Mufasa barking with me. "DOWN BOY!" _WHAP,_ I hit Kakashi. He glared at me and I squeaked, then ran, only to walk into another wall- I mean... get walked into by a wall. Yeah, they walk into _me, _NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND BUDDY!

But this was no wall... this was... a_ Kakashi._ "Give me the book."

"I have a broom! I will Chuck Norris your ass!" I waved said broom back and forth. Then he took it.

"Now I have a broom. And I'll Kakashi your ass." When in this predicament, the only right thing to do is this:

I grabbed Kakashi's shoulders, looked in his eye, dead serious, and screamed.

Then, I slid between his legs and booked it.

But I got hit by another wall in the hallway! Where the hell do they all come from? But this was... ANOTHER KAKASHI!

"Well shit..." I said simply. Then it hit me. "That's what I said right before I got hit by a car!"

"I put your bed together, that was the deal!" He exclaimed and I snorted.

"I had nothing to do with this deal."

"You did."

"You _lie!_"

"_You_ lie!"

"Fish."

"What?"

"You have five seconds to get rid of that word."

"Give me the book."

"What? DAMN! NARUTO!"

"WHAT?"

"YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO GET RID OF THAT WORD."

"SASUKE!"

"Shut up dobe."

"Give me the book."

"Never."

"WHY NOT!"

I widened my left eye, then, with a serious face and my best southern military voice, said, "Because I like makin' you _squirm._"

He eyed me oddly, then swatted me with the broom. "You did _not _just hit me with a broom."

"I did." He shrugged.

"YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN OJI-CHAN! AHHHHH! PERVERSION!"I belted out, hitting him in the head with the book as both teams came running to where I was now in my room.

I got in, closing and locking the door. "Phew, that was a close one..." I whipped the sweat from my brow.

When I turned... _ANOTHER FUCKING WALL HIT ME! _Oh, wait, nope, that's another Kakashi. "You really need to stop that."

"Stop what?" He raised his visible eye brow.

"This whole wall charade. I know you aren't a wall Kakashi." I poked him, stuffing the book back down my shirt.

His eye twitched like I hit a button that said 'SELF DESTRUCT, DO NOT PRESS'. "Give. Me. The. Book."

"N.O." I grinned.

"You're done." He tackled me and tried pulling the book from my shirt, hand down my top.

The door burst open and multiple eyes widened. Naruto was determined to catch flies... "Y-You a-and... Kaka-S-Sensei... doing... THE DIRTY!"He screamed and ran.

Then I realised our position...

He was ontop of me, where he'd tackled me onto my bed, hand down my shirt trying to get his book, over my bra. My hands were on his shoulders and my legs pushed up, where he was between them, and our noses were pressed together.

I coughed, turning my head as he pulled away, with no book... "Well... this is akward."

Sasuke and Sakura were twitching... probably petrified and never able to look at either of us the same way ever again. Neji, Lee, and TenTen were most definately scarred for life, and Guy had a smirk on his face... "My, my, eternal rival Kakashi... I never thought I'd see the day. Expecially with such a beautiful flower." Then they were all gone.

"We'll never hear the end of this, will we?"

"No... we won't."

A few seconds passed after he spoke. " ...Can I have my book back now?"

I snorted. "Fuck no."

"Why not?" He demanded.

"...Because you decided my dignity was less important than your book and boobie raped me." He grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. I scowled at him and debated on glaring at him.

"Sorry..."

"Get off. In the next few weeks I'll have been pregnant, a whore, a good lay, and many other things in the public eye. I'll never live this down... all thanks to you and your pervy reading habits."

"...At least it's with me..."

"Makes it all better." I winked, then rolled my eyes, heading into the kitchen and clearing out the oven of the finished cookies.

He came up behind me and pushed his hand down my shirt, grabbing his book and letting his fingers trail my mound. "...You ever do that again with out my permission and I'll castrate you, ya hear?"

"Yes ma'am." He winked. Then whispered in my ear, "Frisky."

I grabbed a steak knife and we began to play tag... well, I did anyway... "C'MERE PERV! YOU AIN'T HAVIN' NO BABIES!"

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><p><strong>AN: Now, I'm no review whore, but please review! Even the littlest thing will let me know there's more than a couple of people reading my fic! **

**Thank you!**


	4. Chapter 4: Baseball!

**A/N: AHH! Thank you oooooh so much for the reviews!**

_**Kiriari: I like your username! :D I'm glad you like it! And I just had to add the Gibbs-slap... it's awesomeness in it's purest form! And thank you!**_

**_RockerGirlAnime314: I'm glad that made your day! Thank you for the review! :D_**

**_summers revenge: Thank you for complimenting my writing style! :D And I tried to make Naiomi as unique as possible, like no other. She's ment to make people laugh, so I'm glad that works out! And I could just imagine Kakashi doing that, I was dying as I wrote it... And he his a freaking drop dead amazing hottie bad ass... I completely agree ;) Thank you for sating my hunger!_**

**_Verdigirl: Haha yeah, Chuck Norris is just the epitomy of awesome! *Hugs you back, you!*_**

**DISCLAIMER!: I tried to bribe Kakuzu to sell me Naruto. I totally had it going, but then Pein came in and was all bad-ass-leader-like, so I tucked tail and ran.**

**I still have nothing...**

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><p>Waking up, isn't my thing. It's genetic. My uncle woke me up once... he has fake front teeth. My great uncle woke my dad up... he has no teeth. My great great uncle woke my grandpa up... he's dead.<p>

Luckily, Naruto is a ninja. He didn't loose any teeth. But now, I was pretty much like an agitated tiger. But I looked like a lion, what with my hair. Hey, I don't wake up beautiful people! It takes time and patience!

"Nee-Chan? Are you hungry?" The other three ninja whomade up Team Kakashi were eying me warily.

"Un." Grunting, I reunited with my pillow, throwing a huge party... in my head. On the outside, I pulled my blankets up to my chin.

"Uh... okay. Teme, you try!" And I was jabbed in the back roughly. My fist clipped chicken butt's jaw.

"Idiot." He grumbled.

"Ass _whooooooole."_ Meet the Falkers is great. I mean... really great...

"Kaka-sensei, you can handle your onna! Jaa Ne! See you at the training grounds!" Three swishes and it was silent. Smiling, I curled up into a ball and nuzzled my pillow.

"Kami help your children when they wake you up on Christmas morning..." I groaned and shoved my face deeper into my pillow. Maybe if I died, I'd sleep forever... "Haystack looks good on you. And pillow lines? Beautiful."

"Fuck off Hatake, I'm sleeping." I turned my back to him and took a deep breath.

"..." It was silent. But only temporarily. "If we don't get there soon, they'll think we were having rough sex."

"OH C'MON YOU PERV!" I shoved him off my bed and sat up with a dirty look.

I grabbed mesh shorts and solid short shorts that were black. It followed up with a long sleeve mesh shirt with a tight sky blue tank top. I grabbed black lingerie, and set off to the bathroom.

I took a quick shower, then got outand brushed my wild hair. iput on eye-liner and mascara, a bit of cover up and headed out.

"Shower sex? I like it." Instead of glaring, I flicked him on his masked cheek.

"Of course you would."

We walked in silence as I munched on my chocolate chip muffin. It was smart of the copy-nin to keep his mouth shut. I tend to be _very_ disagreeable in the mornings.

After the muffin, I was still hungry. And the fruit Shope seemed extremely appatizing...

So I veered off course, earning a "Hey!" from the confused ninja.

I began gathering food into my basket, ignoring the annoyed sigh from behind. Very close behind.

"Stuff it pops, I'm hungry."

"You _just ate_."

"Your point is?"

"You'll never make it as a ninja."

"I know where you sleep bitch, keep an eye open."

"I'm terrified."

"You don't know how good I am with those throw-y thing-ys. Not to mention I have a meanbatting average, and I would love to use your head as a base ball."

"You do realise, half of the time that you speak, no one understands what's coming out of your mouth. At this, I turned, narrowing my eyes.

"Wanna repeat that, _punk?_" I demanded,poking him in his very firm, very manly, chest. Oooh boy. ;)

"I'd be honored to." I wanted so badly to smack that smirk off his face...

"YOU STOLE KAKASHI-KUN!" Suddenly, that squad of fangirls behind me was painfully obvious.

Then they charged. I threw some yen at the merchant, then used the substitution jutsju to get the hell out of there. I snickered as they looked around, then the " That was smart. Shockingly."

"You are so lucky I'm a nice person. So lucky." The Jounin chuckled as I huffed, kicking pebbles across the ground. But then I bit into a little piece of heavan and a moan of appriciation came from my lips. It was all sunshine and lolly pops from there on out.

"You don't want to make those noises. They make me think dirty thoughts about and with you."

I ignored that comment. "You're a-hundred-percent sure you're not bi-polar?" My eyes dulled and I slowly allowed my head to turn in his direction.

"No. You wanna find out?" My voice held the glare and malice for me.

"No thanks. I'd wrather not get chased with a knife again." He eye smiled as we neared the training grounds.

"YOU'RE LATE!" The pink haired girl and whisker faced boy shouted and pointed in our faces. I rolled my eyes and kept walking.

"I'm not late, you're just early." Kakashi let out a chuckle and the three genin sweat dropped.

"I'll have to remember that one."

"Hey...Nee-Chan? Is that... food?" I grinned at Naruto and nodded.

"And I'll share with everyone!" Tossing the three kids their fruits, I earned mumbled thanks. And one, "ARIGATAU NEE-CHAN!"

However, my seventeen years of base ball, a little chakra, and an evil grin were the tools I used when throwing the fruit to Kakashi.

I pretended there was a pitchers plate in front of me, then reared my left leg up. Then I snapped it down and yelled, ""BATTER UP!"And whipped that shit at the silver haired ninja.

He lifted a hand to catch it, and when he did his visable eye widened and he dropped the now smushed fruit to the cold, hard ground.

I cheekily grinned, bouncing and yelled, "STEEE-RIKE!"

He glared at me and I shrugged. "Sorry, forgot you weren't wearing a mit Kakashi-Kun!" The alot lighter, tossed him the fruit. He caught it with his left hand, while healing chakra lit up his left one. It didn't slip past me that while he lifted fruit, the kids watched with wide eyes.

Then, smoke errupted from _god knows where_, and I went into a fit of coughing and flappingmy arms about, ultimately landing on my back. The smoke cleared and Kakashi was clear in my vision again, an apple core in his right, healed hand. I rolled onto my stomach, cupping my chin in my palms. "As my mother once screeched, 'THE FASTER YOU EAT, THE MORE YOU FART!' but I don't have a wooden spoon to hit you with. I'll get you later."

And i got four odd looks. WOOT! "No, seriously, I'm gonna laugh when you let one rip on a date, or in a meeting."

Naruto burst out laughing, Sakura punched him in the head, he fell over , and Sasuke cave manned. Kakashi just raised an eye brow.

"If you think I'm odd, picture me, only ten times worse. Then you have my mother. And ooooh buddy she gets angry when you don't do your laundry." I winked then folded my arms and rested my head on them.

"Where'd you learn to throw that way?" The Jounin demanded.

"Seventeen years of baseball as pitcher. What I threw you, my baseball deprived friend, is called a knuckle ball. The you have your fast ball, splitter, curve ball, and change up. My gramps got obsessed when he visited America, and my family became baseball orientated. Hense a batting average. If we concoct enough people, I'll teach you how to play! It's real fun! And it'll sooth our competitive Sasuke!" I winked yet again after lifting my head.

"I'm guessing it had something to do with bases and balls?" Sakura seemed interested.

"Yup. First base, second base, third base, and home plate. Then between second and third you have short stop. Those are all in field,along withthe pitchers mound. Then you have outfield, which is left field, center field, and right field. You'll need asmall compact ball and a couple bats. They tend to break. Like I said, if we get enough people, I'll teachyou how to play!" I tend to ramble when I talk about baseball... but I'd marry it if I could.

"Sounds complicated." Sasuke decided to give his input.

"To you guys, yeah. but I almost got a scholarship to a real good college with it, but... then they saw my grades. Life sucks." I scratched the back of my head.

"At least there's one thing you're good at." I couldn't see but under that mask, i knew Kakashi was smirking.

"Fuck _yoooooooooou._" Look, you can switch out the words and it still sounds good!

"You have a really bad mouth Nee-Chan..." Naruto scratched the back of his head. I swear, the kid is just like me.

"Cursing is her way of coping." Sasuke actually talked... and not caveanese either!

"Coping with what cave man?" I allowed my eyes to narrow, bordering a glare.

"Frustration, depression, lackof hope... betrayal." Now my eyes were really narrowed.

"Frustration, yes. Depression, fuck no. Lack of hope, yes. ...Betrayal, yeah." I rolled ontomy back and folded my arms behind my head. "But that's not who I am." I winked again and closed my eyes tightly. "I'm not one of many emotions."

Silence accomidated my mood nicely.

"Well, lets start training."

I wasn't aloud to throw things at the kids. And I felt watched during target practice. I didn't hold back, using deadly force and aim to nail the bulls eye with a single finger. The 'shuriken', I just called them ninja stars, were easy to throw. The small ones anyway. I was, however,more interested in the kunai because I could spin it on any one ofmy fingers and throw whenever I felt like it.

"We'll have to get you some sebon." I jumped when the copy-nin spoke behind me and dropped the shuriken.

"Give a girl a heart attack, why don't you?" I rubbed my eyes.

"Training is over, same time tomorrow."

"I'm making Ramen and... I don't know, something else.

My statement drew an, "I'm coming over!" From Naruto, and a slight, "Hn." From Sasuke and Kakashi.

"My parents are expecting me. Sorry Omi-Chan!" And Sakura ran off.

"Okay- Wait! YOU'RE LEAVING ME WITH _THOSE!"_ All I heard was her laughter.

I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest. It was silent the rest of the way over, until Mufasa started jumping and barking. "Hello puppy!" I pet his head and trotted afterme happily.

"Puppy?" Kakashi retorted.

"Yeah, gotta problem old fart?" I'm such a nice person...

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><p><strong>AN: So... while I was writing this, my grandpa starts flipping out on my uncle, yelling about how he's gonna shoot him with his own bebe gun. **

**So to get them to shut up, I yelled at my cousin "YOU'RE FRONT TEETH ARE SO GAPPED I DON'T KNOW WETHER TO SMILE BACK OR KICK A FIELD GOAL!" And everyone in the house turned to look at me. **

**My step dad totally dissed me and said, "You really need to go back to counciling." so my grandpa shot him in the ass!**

I was ROTFLMAO!

xD

Not to mention, in the USA, a woman, and republican!, got elected to be in the vote for President! WOOT! We need a woman in office here, these men don't know what they're doing! No offense to the male gender...

IMPORTANT!:

I'm going to be editing some of these chapters, because I haven't gotten the chance to revise them that often... I really need a beta!

The next chapter is already written out, so review if you want to read it!

It'll be posted friday, most likely. If not, monday.

I LOVE YOU ALL! No homo what-so-ever.

That's the end of this monster...


	5. Chapter 5: Gennin Exam!

**A/N: D'x what happened to all the lovely reviews? It's okay, I still love you guys!**

**To those who did review...**

_**Avenging Pineapple Dreamer:**__** I very much so believe that your scheme to bribe Pein will work! Woot! Thank you for the constructive critisim as well! :D**_

_**DiMe: **__**Thank you! I'm glad you think it's awesome! :D And no worries, there will be fluff in the next chapter! I hope that will be awesome as well!**_

**_Verdigurl (): *Ultimate-super-special-awesome-stealing-YuGiOh!-Abrigid-referances-hug-of-awesome-ness!* :D_**

**_I'd also like to give a thank you to all who favorited, or alerted my story! :D I love you all!_**

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><p><strong><em>Disclaimer...<em>**

**_I don't own anything yet. But no fears my good readers, Avengin Pineapple Dreamer and I are working on it!_**

**_Warning: There's alot of language in this chapter. Please don't be angry with me. It's a part of the OC's character! _**

**_There is end note, but please review! _**

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><p>The only thing I hate more than strawberry poptarts? Tests. Tests of all kinds, shapes and sizes. They're ignorant little buggers who scream 'TAKE ME, TAKE ME!' And then... you fail. You think your doing good, then the bitch turns and starts asking about pie, and circumfrance.<p>

Yes, I'm going to need _pie_ when I'm ninty-five years old and in a nursing home. Yes, okay. You believe that, I'll be brushing my dentures and talking about the same thing for twenty years. Okay? Okay. Have a nice day.

"I don't wannaaaaaaaa." I whined, beating on the silver haired mans back. He was taking me to my impending doom. The Gennin exam, with a bunch of snot nosed brats who will someday own the world.

"You have to." This bitch. So, I enfused chakra into my backpounds, and he grunted, pulling me over and holding me bridal style.

"I don't do tests." I grumbled, crossing my arms over my chest and huffing.

"You do now."

"Yeah, she _does _someone else too." Naruto snickered under his breath, but I silenced him with a stern look, borderlining a glare. It sucks not being able to glare at people anymore. ... I mean, it really sucks.

"Naruto..." Kakashi growled at him, a dirty look on his face.

"Yeah, yeah it's not becoming of a lady to be called a common whore." Naruto laughed, rolling his eyes. I smiled, tilting my head.

"Thank's Naruto, being called a common whore does wonders on my ego!" I then pouted, feeling slightly hurt.

"I'm sure Kaka-Sensei'll kiss it better!" Sakura errupted in flames and procceded to punch Naruto in the back of his head.

"NARUTO NO BAKA, THAT'S THEIR PERSONAL LIFE, BACK OFF!" Sasuke cave-manned, Naruto whimpered, Kakashi well... Kakashi-ed, and I laughed.

"They are reeeeeally stupid. I mean, honestly, my great grandpa is probably younger than you. I don't date old bags. How old are you any way? A-hundred-and-seven... A-hundred-and-six?" I got the in-famous and rare dirty look from Kakashi! Hoo-rah! Three in one hour, I'm good.

"Wait, you two... aren't a couple?" Sakura was in shock.

"Nope." I flashed a peace sign to the pink haired girl. "We've been telling you this for... how long now?"

"Then what were you doing that one time? And the other time? And all those other times?" Naruto exclaimed.

"Oji-Chan was trying to get his book." I rolled my eyes and swung my feet back and forth.

"Ohh..." The three seemed slightly less scarred. "How do you always manage to get it from him?"

"It's a gift." I shrugged. "Hey, old man, put me down. I ain't takin' no test!"

"You're taking the test. You have no choice." He snapped, frustrated. I have serious talent. I can steal his book and piss him off in a total of like... three seconds.

"FUCK THE FREE WORLD!" I got alot of dirty looks and mutters about me... it became a daily thing.

"Would you stop yelling random things?" Yup... definately a talent.

"C'mere." I whispered, pulling his unmasked ear closer to my lips. "NEVER!" Then I licked his ear. Yup, I'm evil.

"You. Are. The. Most. Difficult. Person. To. _Not_. Hurt." He grit out, rubbing his ear on his shoulder.

"I take pride in that accuastion. That's what you get for taking me to the evils of the testing enviornment."

"He's gonna kill her one day."

"I'll be cheering him on."

"THERE YOU GO! Team spirit cave man! First step to a healing enviornment! See, my evil ways bring people together, even if it'll most likely harm me." I winked an eye, then leaned my head back. People eyed me oddly. You would too. Have you ever seen a grown woman act like a child? It's very entertaining.

"Why did we get stuck with two idiots?" I gasped, looking at Sasuke.

"I swear on my life that's the most I've ever heard you speak cave man." Cue a death glare. "Doin' donuts in the parkin' lot screamin' I don't give a _fuck_, with his windows down and his system up!"

I swear, it was my obligation to annoy Team Seven. Boy, did I do a good job of it.

"Can't you be normal for _one hour?"_ Sasuke grit out.

"Psh, that's like asking the world to blow up. If I'm normal, I'm pissed, and if I'm pissed, I'm hot or cold. Either way, somebody's gettin' layed the fuck out." Snorting, they looked at me unapprovingly.

"Here we are." Kakashi set me on my feet, and I went to run for it, but of course a wall ran smack into me. But this was really a wall.

"Fucker." I groaned, rubbing my nose.

"You're cursing alot today." Sakura noted, pushing me forward into the acadamy.

"Cause I don't want to take this mother fucking bitch ass test, sent to piss me the fuck off!" I exclaimed, getting more hard earned odd looks.

"I think she needs anger management." Naruto said with a smirk on his face.

"That's it, never again will I invite any you over for dinner, OR desert!" Naruto gave me a look of horror, Kakashi looked a little shocked, Sakura was now glaring at Naruto, and Sasuke looked indifferent.

"B-B-BUT ONEE-CHAN! YOU MAKE THE BEST GINGERBREAD MEN!" Poor Naruto... But I was going to have some fun with this.

"Not anymore! Never again will you taste my nan's secret recipe for gingerbread men." As we entered the room, a bunch of kids eyed us with there forehead protectors on.

"Ahh! The last student! Come now, transform into a perfect version of the Lady Hokage!" I scratched the back of my head, trying to remember the hand symbols for the Henge No Jutsu.

"Henge No Justsu!" I used the right amount of chakra to get myself a little bit ahead of the other kids, meaning more detail.

"Very nice, very nice! Alright, here's your Hitai-Ate!" I took the band and huffed, tying it around my neck.

"Now what?"

"You come with us, and they get split into groups."

"Wait, I'm stuck with you?"

"You're stuck with us? More like _we're _stuck with **you**." Kakashi huffed and I scowled at him.

"Yay. Why?"

"The Hokage thought it would be a better idea because of your... age to put you with older and more mature people." The instructor laughed.

"Yeah, mature, okay." I rolled my eyes then huffed. "I need to have a word with Tsunade-Sama."

"Oh-ho-ho, you do, do you?" I turned, facing that very woman.

"My lawyer and sense of self preservation do not approve of the choice made for me, of where my capeabilities lie. It would be very much appriciated, if you _get me the hell away from these crazies!_"

She simply laughed and shook her head. "I knew there was a brain in there somewhere!"

"Yes, and it's very rusty and dusty from misuse." I nodded my head, folding my arms

"Who are you and what have you done with Naiomi?" Naruto waved his hand in front of my face.

"I'm her counterpart."

"Ahh, so you're the good one?"

"Aha ha, ha. Very funny old man." I rolled my eyes.

"Is there something going on you two need to tell me?"

"No, we aren't fucking behind everyones back. That's a rumor."

"That was vague." Tsunade said simple.

"You betcha'." I winked.

"So... you're a gennin now..." Kakashi said.

"Mhmmmm. Soon, I'll be a chuunin, and then I'll kick your ass."

"Ha, yeah, I'd pay to see that!" Naruto snickered.

"Shut up wise ass, I'm gonna kick your ass too!"

"No language young lady." Tsunade scolded and the five of us (Me, Hatake, Izumaki, Haruno, and Uchika) scoffed.

"Me without language is like a chicken without a head." I felt a hand drop on my shoulder, and turned to face Kakashi.

"We'll be visiting the training grounds to give the... next step." And he turned, walking us out.

"Next step? What next step? I AIN'T TAKIN' NO WRITTEN EXAM!" The kids in the class giggled at my outrage.

"You'll do what I tell you." He said simply, looking at me over his shoulder.

"Yeah. 'Cause that's likely." I huffed, crossing my arms. "I suck at written exams. I always bomb them. Haven't passed a single test sense I got into high school."

"What about before that?" Naruto asked from my side.

"A-student." I muttered.

I recieved a few looks of disbelief.

"No way? You? An A-Student?" Naruto laughed.

My cheeks blushed slightly, and I took over Sakura's job, punching him in the back of the head. "WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN BAKA?"

"N-NOTHING! You just... don't act like an A-student..."

"..." A gay baby had just been born and God did the duggie. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKIN' 'BOUT MO FUDGER?"

And once again, I was strewn over Kakashi's shoulder. This bitch.

"You really need to watch your mouth, people are starting to think you have no self control." Leave it to him to know how to piss me the fuck off.

"Have I _ever _seemed to have self control, you dick beating, bitch licking, cock sucking-"

"We get it, he's got alot of colorful names in your vocabulary. No language."

"Well listen to this in my colorful vocabulary. I AIN'T TAKIN' NO MOTHER FUCKING WRITTEN ASS EXAM YOU BITCH ASS PUSSYS!" My screams attracted the attention of the whole village.

"Naiomi."

"What?"

"Shut up."

"Why?"

"I said so."

"But I don't wanna..."

Kakashi had anger written all over his face. I'm telling you, pissing someone off that much is a talent. Really, you try getting under someone's skin this much, I'll laugh as you fail with epicness. "To. Bad."

"I really think the world on terror is a bunch of bull shit. Just a poor excuse to use up all your bullets." Sasuke rolled his eyes at me.

After we got to the clearing, I was given the task of getting the bells from Kakashi. He was sitting in the clearing, reading, and I had a half an hour to get the bells from him left.

I had to think out a plan... and a good one. So, I made them all think I wasn't doing anything my rambling random stuff. But really, my mind was full of detailed stradigies to get those bells from his hip.

So far, I'd thought of making a clone, saying I have to take a leak and sending the clone back, masking my chakra, and using my book stealing idea's to get the bells. But he was too smart to fall for that...

So, I took it to the extreme's.

"Give me my book!"

"Give me the bells!"

"GIVE ME THE BOOK!"

"Nope. You give me, the mother fucking bells." His one eyed glare was vicious, and I scowled.

"Do you want me to glare at you, put you in the worst pain you've ever felt, and take them that way? 'Cause I will." My words were dripping with the most serious tone I've ever used, and this drew shocked eyes to me. "HA! You actually fell for that!"

"You wouldn't." He stated simply, glaring.

So a sadistic smile played on my lips. "And who are you to think you know me?"

Mufasa barreled into the clearing, and when I looked, that dog boys mutt was going for him. They stopped and faced off, snarling and growling at the other.

Now, Mufasa is _huge_- for a regular dog. But Akamaru is a _ninja_ dog. My pup would get his ass kicked.

"Mufasa, back off. You, doggy, leave him alone." The longer I stayed here, the more those two pissed me off. The longer I stayed here, the more I wanted to go home. But some Danzo guy was really pissing me off. Team 7 didn't know, but I'd been getting trained late into the night by Anbu and the Hokage herself. I wasn't aloud to show that skill though, because it was a 'secret weapon'.

"AKAMARU! GET BACK HERE!" I looked down to my beast, and he was sitting at my heels, looking up at me. He was my dog, my best friend, he knew when I was pissed.

"Our dogs need to get family counciling. Every fucking week, they're at each others necks." My voice was ticked, and I was getting a few looks of concern. They didn't think I could be serious... bitches.

"Haha, yeah..." The boy scratched the back of his neck and I sighed.

"I'm busy. Duces. Mufasa, go sit over there. Let's get this over with."

**Twenty minutes later:**

"How did you do that?" Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke were eying me in awe.

Apparently, simple is good with Ninja. They think everything to be overly complex, so they get thrown off with simple things... I got the bells!

"I'm a mother fucking ninja bitches. I can do anything."

"She got lucky."

"I got smart."

"You got lucky."

"You're being pissy because I beat you at your own game."

"I didn't know you were a stratigist. Normally you need brains for that."

"Aha-ha-ha, fuck you."

"When and where."

"Right here, right now."

"Come over here."

"You come over here."

"You want to fuck me, you come over here."

"YOU GOTTA WORK FOR IT BITCH!" Then I took off running.

"Why are our adults kids?" Sakura cried out, holding onto Sasuke's arm.

Kakashi was standing in my path to my appartment.

"I won." I smirked and plowed right into him, knocking us both over.

"Nope. I did." I winked and booked it into my house.

"YOU CHEATED!"

"I JACKIE CHAN-ED YOUR ASS!"

"YOU _CHEATED!"_

"I BRUCE LEE-ED YOUR ASS TOO!"

"YOU FUCKING _CHEATED!_"

"FINE BITCH! I FUCKING JET LEE-ED, JACKIE CHAN-ED, BRUCE LEE-ED, CHUCK NORRIS-ED YOUR ASS! AND I CHEATED! WHAT YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT!" There was hysterical laughter coming from my building. It was full of eight-teen year olds, and they thought I was Kami's gift to commody.

"GET DOWN HERE AND YOU'LL FIND OUT!"

"YOU COME UP HERE!"

"I WILL!"

"DO IT THEN!" More hysterical laughter.

"Open the door." I was holding the door shut with my body weight.

"I tired and lazy, so I'm just gonna stay here if that's alright with you." Even my voice held light humor, but apparently, it wasn't funny.

"You need to be punished." How the hell... oh, right, he ninja-ppeared.

"Can we punish me tomorrow, I'm tired at the moment."

"NEE-CHAN, I'M HUNGRYYYYYYY!"

"I'm like a mom. I cook you food, yell at you when you're not clean... I'm to young to be your mother. I don't want to be a whore!"

"Your some mother. You can hardly take care of yourself, let alone kids."

"I resent that."

"I'm shocked. You used a big word."

"Get a dictionary."

**A/N: **


	6. Chapter 6: The Fluff!

**A/N: This chapter is pretty short, sorry about that. :( But I'm scared to write more because I'm kind of depressed. My Uncle Bob is in the hospital with the final stages of cancer, so I'm more worried about him than this story, I apologise for that. :(**

_**Storygirl11:**__** I'm glad you think it's so funny**__**, though it's sort of toned down for now... but there's still some funny...-ness. :)**_

_**Kuroryu Clan:**__** I had to look back at my e-mail a couple times to get your pen-name right! I'm glad you think it's funny, and be careful what you wish for, this story is somewhat a crack-fic... ;) But I plan on bringing the Akatsuki into this. Very shortly. :)**_

_**Sayonara Yasashii Akumu: **__**I tried to type your name, I really did... okay, I lied. I copyed it, I'm sorry! D'x Keep goin' I shall! And I really hope you don't have breathing problems, because the next chapter... woo, I have plans for that one!**_

_**Verdigurll:**__** OH IT'S ON LIKE KING KONG! *Super-fantastical-awesome-hug-of-greatness-with-the-superest-non-existant-words-ever-thought-of-like-POWZOO-oh-yeeeeeaah!* ;)**_

**_Once again a wonderful hug and cheek kiss from me to all my lovely readers, including those who've favorited, alerted, or fallowed this story! PLEASE REVIEW! :)_**

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><p>If there's one thing I missed about my home, it'd have to be my grandparents. I'd sit for hours at there house, just talking. My grandma would normally have either a cake, brownies, or cookies in the oven.<p>

My grandpa would be playing his harmonica, with a baseball game on T.V., or the news for politics. My grandma would tell me about the latest news in the family, wether it be a pregnant cousin, a fired uncle, or anything like that.

I'd curl up on the couch and listen to my grandpa tell me stories of when he was young, and what it was like in Vietnam. He'd show me his long bow, his rifle, his major league baseball gloves... Yeah. I definately missed them the most.

"Maa... what's wrong with her? She's actually being quiet today..." Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke were sitting in my kitchen as I prepared a meal. There was Ramen on the stove, and something special in the other pot.

"Yeah... what's wrong?" Sakura looked up at me as I stirred the noodles. The water was simmering, and I tapped the spoon to rid it of any excess liquid on the side of the pot.

"I'm just thinking back to my world. I miss my grandparents." I smiled at them over my shoulder and Naruto narrowed his eyes at me.

"Who are you? You're too calm to be Naiomi-Chan." He began poking me, and multiple tick marks showed up on my face.

"Poke me again, and I'll prove to you that I am Naiomi, by ripping your hand off your body with a spoon." My voice was deadly calm as normal.

"Yep, that's her." He smiled, moving back to the chair.

"What about your parents?" Sakura came to help, stirring the noddles.

"I wasn't very close with them... but I was close with my grandparents. It was hard to see them after we left Okinawa though." I smiled whole heartedly as I thought back onmy grandma.

"What were they like?" Naruto asked.

"The best people you could find. My grandma was short, and looked just like me, just round and wrinkly. And my grandpa was tall, with white hair. He loved baseball and politics... my grandma loved to gossip. She made the best brownies though. And Udon? You haven't had good Udon unless you've had my grandma's Udon." I patted my stomach just thinking about it.

"What about your parents?" Sakura asked.

"They traveled alot. I don't really know them all too well. My mom is flighty, and my dad does whatever makes her happy. They left me with my grandparents for eleven months out of the year and traveled all over the world. Then I turned eight-teen and we moved to Japan, because I could be by myself." I began filling bowls, and Kakashi chose then to come in.

"Oh, food." He sat at the table and broke Naruto's chopsticks.

"Naruto, in that draw right there I have a pair of nice chopsticks. I came here with them in my pocket. I'm shocked they didn't break." Kakashi's visible eye brow rose.

"Who are you, and what've you done with Naiomi-Chan?"

"That's her! She threatened to pull my hand off with a spoon before when I was poking her!" Naruto grinned, happy that he got the fancy chopsticks and not Sasuke.

"She's just reflecting alot today. Tell us about your home land Naiomi!" Sakura prompted, smiling greatfully as I placed a bowl of Ramen in front of her.

"Okinawa... it's my favorite place in the whole world! There's alot of mountains, and it's a small Island off of Europe. There's alot of farming that goes on there, and it's a good place to grow original Bonsai tree's. It's mainly made of busy towns, with a few exceptions, like my home. I lived in a compound. And they aren't very advanced technologically. It's a beautiful place, and the beaches are pretty. I love Okinawa." I could imagine the salty taste in the air, the pleantiful plants and fresh air. It was a beautiful place.

"It sounds kind of like here..." Naruto said stupidly, and I smirked, nailing him in the forehead with a spoon.

"We don't have Ninja's jumping around like idiot's there! We have Kung Fu artists! But... they'd get beaten up bad by you guys." Naruto grinned proudly, rubbing his forehead.

"Do you miss it?"

"Of course. But I'm happy I met you guys too! Now shut the hell up and eat." With the exception of Sasuke, he smirked, while we smiled and dug in.

"This ish gooood. Ish not ash goo ash Ichirchu's but, ish goo!" Sakura gave Naruto a look of digust, as did the other three, while I grinned wolfishly.

"Sea food!" And I opened my mouth wide, chewed ramen showing. Now I got the looks of disgust.

Then I returned to wolfing down my food. Not really tasting it, but making sure it was chewed so I don't choke. But me, being, well... me, I choked anyway.

I was holding my throat and coughing up a storm, my face turning red.

"What do we do!" Naruto screamed, as I fell out of my chair.

"I-I don't know, clap her on the back!" Sasuke actually looked panicked...

Naruto began ramming his palm into my back, and Kakashi stopped him. He pulled me up, put his hands under my lungs, and pulled them in.

He repeated it a couple times, until my food shot across the kitchen, out the open window. Mufasa looked crest fallen.

I took a drink of water and a few deep breaths. "Thanks."

He laughed and went to ruffle my hair, but I hugged him instead. "No more wolfing down your food. Naruto, that goes for you too." He akwardly returned the hug.

"Aww..." Sakura cooed, and we broke apart. I glared at her, breaking the lovey-dovey air by stating:

"Jesus just face-planted."

Sasuke rolled his eyes, Naruto laughed, Kakashi sighed, and Sakura pouted.

"You just ruined the moment Baka!" Sakura screamed, glaring at me.

"What moment?" I exclaimed back.

"The... oh, never mind." She huffed, turned her back, and started muttering to Sasuke about something that made him smirk.

He nodded and explained it to Naruto, while Kakashi and I were left out of the loop.

"What is this? I thought you guys loved me?" I cried out, glaring at the three children.

"We do. But you're to old to be in the loop. It's under eighteen only!" Sakura smiled sweetly. Fine. Two can play at that game.

"Okay then. Well, don't talk to strangers. Kakashi and I are gonna go out and do something for over twenty one. So ha." I stuck my tong out at them and dragged Kakashi out of the house.

"Use protection!" Sasuke yelled out the window.

"Shut your mouth! You're to young to know about stuff like that!" I shouted back. Kakashi rolled his eyes at my loud mouth.

"Where are you dragging me?" He demanded.

"To Tsunade-Sama. She owe's me a Sake drinking contest." I grinned widely up at him, making sure to throw in a sweet wink.

"Oh no, I'm not going to be held responsable for your drunken self. No way. Let's go train. You need it." He said simply, giving me a strict glance.

I pouted, then gave him a dirty look that I seemed to use in my glaring absence. "You fun killer. How do you sleep at night?"

"Very easily."

"Fuck you."

"We've been through this already." That dirty pervert.

"Lemme re-phrase that. Go fuck yourself."

"I'd much wrather have you do it for me." I couldn't see under that mask of his, but I had a funny feeling he was wearing a smirk on his face.

"You wish."

"And if I do?" He spared me a one eyed glance that I returned with a smirk.

"I'll do something you'll never forget."

"Why do I have a feeling that plan has something to do with rendering me unable to provide you with children?" I shot him a smirk.

"Because it does." Then the second half of his sentance hit me. "Ha, I would not have your kids."

"You would, and you know it." We entered the training area, and I plopped onto the ground, starring him down... well, up, because I'm shorter than him, and I'm sitting while he isn't...

"I'll pass." My stomach was settling, and let out a content grumble.

"See, your stomach want's my babies in it." He gave me a one eyed wink and I responded by rolling both of my eyes.

"You keep telling yourself that." My voice held light hint's of laughter in it.

There was a nice, comfy silence for a few minutes before he sat down next to me, whispering, "Maybe I will..."

And I was all too aware of the flaring heat in my cheeks.

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><p><strong>AN: A little fluff thrown in there for you!**

**So, I was writing this, and I come out into my living room, and my grandpa is watching some horror movie on t.v. and playing his harmonica.**

**I didn't know it was a horror movie, and this bad ass leprichaun pops up out of NO WHERE, and scares the SHIT out of me. I threw my nan's computer into the couch, that's how scared I got. **

**Everyone else got a good laugh out of it when I sprained my wrist punching the t.v. though. -.-'**

Have any of you ever seen that video on youtube where that clown pops out of a box, and there's a guy standing in front of him, and he punches the clown in his face...? Well, it was kind of like that, but the clown was

**a t.v., and I threw a computer...**

**But that little fucking leprichaun got blown up in a well by gasoline and a match, so it's all good. **

Insight to the next chapter anyone? Well, here it is anyway!:

He had black hair, like Sasuke. He had red eyes, like Sasuke. He spoke Caveanese, like Sasuke. Who the fuck is this guy? Don't he know that Sasuke is the only one who can pull off Sasuke? He obviously tries too hard. With those bags under his eyes, I'd say he looses sleep over it.

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Head of the Sasuke fan club? Bitch, that's my position." I crossed my arms under my chest and the blue guy eyed me oddly. "Who the fuck are you looking at, fish-stick? You look like a smurf on steroid's."

"Are you sure this is the girl, Itachi?" S.O.S. (Smurf on Steroids) gave a begrudging look to the Sasuke-wannabe.

"She fit's the description. Loud. Rude. Obnoxious. And her eyes are the right color." He had the nerve to say all this with a straight face. This bitch.

"Oh,_ hell no. _Shit's about to go _down _on this mother fucker." I readied myself to deliver the most vicious glare I've ever dished out.


	7. Chapter 7: The Glare!

**A/N: I just typed this whole thing up, hit the wrong link, and now, I have to retype it. -.- BUT! I'm cutting it short. I have the next chapter written up as well, so review fast if you want it, because I may loose my wifi in hurricane Irene... why didn't I just say that in the first place? D'x I'm sorry my loves!**

**Now, for my thank you's!**

_**Akumu:**** I love you darling! (No homo) I really do! Thank you oh so very much for the abriviation! If you thought that last chapter was fluffy, you'll really want the next one. ;) And now... Naiomi wasn't on the 'in' about the whole big bro-little bro situation. :P So, in her mind, Itachi (who is hot) is the leader of the Sasuke (who is also hot in shippudon) fan club!**_

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><p><em><strong>Verdigurll: <strong>__**I had the perfect come back**__** written out! D'x and then I went to ... -.- but *Hug-of-love* cause I love youuu! :) No homo.**_

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><p><em><strong><span>Kaitrau Seras Viktoria Hatake<span>: I totally just cheated by copying and pasting your pen-name... ;) THIS BITCH IS UPDATING! Oh yes, we have alot, aaloooottt in common. ;)**_

_**1. Kakashi-Sensei is like a walking fucking god-of-HAWTTTT.:3**_

_**2. I can't live with out cursing. (I'm a bad ass bitch. ;])**_

_**3. Me? Normal? Pshhhh. that's like asking a cat to piss sideways.**_

_**4. Rough is better. ;) jkjk.**_

_**5. They wanted to put a 'most evil' segment in the year book with me as the face, and my mom went ape-shit nuts on them... lol**_

_**I'm updating, don't hyperventilate! (totally just failed at spelling that... oh well. lol) And you. Are. A. Fucking. Genious. Alls I gotta say. ;)**_

_**Chuck Norris knows where I live? Ohhh... teehee... maybe he's stalking me.. then, we can make a new karate kid movie, with a kick ass GIRL, cause we rule. ;)**_

_**D: I totally didn't cheat.. okay I did. But it works! :)**_

_**YOSH!**_

_**Halo**_

_**xxxxXXXxxxx**_

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><p><em><strong>Storygirl11: <strong>__**Well wait no more! And... I guess you'll just have to stick around and find out... ;D**_

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><p><em><strong> And once again, thank you to all my silent readers and favoriters and... followers... followers... whoa, sounds kinda creepy if you think about it. *_* ^_^<strong>_

_**I no ownzez nothing! D'x**_

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><p>I had been having a good day. A wonderful day. Potentially the best day of my life. I'd gotten wasted with the Hokage for a drinking contest, won, and she whipped up a hangover cure, and something to stunt our drunken hazes.<p>

Then, I ended up eating a sandwich at a close by shop, found paper on it, and got free ice cream and twenty percent off the overall bill.

Following that, I'd had a decent conversation with Sasuke about Shuriken, and he actually spoke real words, not his language!

And then, I realized why everyone was being so nice to me. The date was, or would be, August 26th. I turned twenty three today

How did I know this?

Naruto of course.

"Hey Shikamaru! Today's Naiomi-Chan's twenty-third birthday! Be extra nice to her today!" Of course, this made my day better. Everyone was being really nice today, and I got a free cake from the bakery, and a small baby Bonsai from the florist's.

Even better? I was excused from training!

It was nearing the end of the day, and I wanted to savor this day until sunset, so I headed over to the Hokage Mountain, to look over the town.

Little did I know, I was under a genjutsu, and there was another pair of creep's waiting for me up there.

A blue guy... and a Sasuke wannabe. Sasuke's good looking an all, but this is taking things to extreme's...

"Hn." Okay, that's just taking things too far.

He had black hair, like Sasuke. He had red eyes, like Sasuke. He spoke Caveanese, like Sasuke. Who the fuck is this guy? Don't he know that Sasuke is the only one who can pull off Sasuke? He obviously tries too hard. With those bags under his eyes, I'd say he looses sleep over it.

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Head of the Sasuke fan club? Bitch, that's my position." I crossed my arms under my chest and the blue guy eyed me oddly. "Who the fuck are you looking at, fish-stick? You look like a smurf on steroid's."

"Are you sure this is the girl, Itachi?" S.O.S. (Smurf on Steroids) gave a begrudging look to the Sasuke-wannabe.

"She fit's the description. Loud. Rude. Obnoxious. And her eyes are the right color." He had the nerve to say all this with a straight face. This bitch.

"Oh, hell no. Shit's about to go down on this mother fucker." I readied myself to deliver the most vicious glare I've ever dished out.

When I did... all he did was twist up his face and scrunch up slightly. So I put more power into it. A pained gasp escaped his lips, and the blue guy looked at him in shock.

But that wasn't good enough. This mother fucker would be rolling on the ground crying for his mother when I decided that was enough. Calling me those names? Hell no! Was I being rash... yeah, I am.

I was doing this for another reason though... one that just hit me. This guys face was in the bingo book. Hopefully, I could hold them off long enough for Anbu to get here.

"...Get...her..." Sasuke-Wannabe grit out, looking ready to collapse.

His partner turned, then lunged at me. I made the mistake of switching my glare to him, rather than lowering the pain level slightly and spreading it to the two of them.

In that instant, I was restrained with a black cloth wrapped around my eyes.

"This is definitely her." Sasuke-Wannabe didn't sound like he'd been in any pain at all.

"That actually hurt... alot." S.O.S. grit out, sounding like he was wincing at just the memory.

"You bitches, wait until I can glare at you again, I'll make you wish you were six feet under! Let me go wussy, I'll kick your ass! God, I'm getting kidnapped on my fucking birthday..." The last sentence was out of hope that they would let me go. But I doubted it would work. Yeah, it didn't help at all.

Actually, I think they tightened the bonds on my wrists...

But my feet were free... a big mistake on their part.

Mustering up as much chakra as I could, I reared my foot right into the S.O.S.'s groin. I was dropped instantly, and when my ankle's were gripped, I lashed out, smashing my forehead into the Sasuke-Wannabe's.

The guy didn't even flinch! How do I know? I hurt my head to much to move back right away. "Shit! What, are you impersonating the fucking terminator now? God, this fucking place just get's better and better, don't it?"

"Naiomi!" I'd recognize that voice anywhere...

"Naruto, no, run! Get help, then come after me! Run damn it!" I didn't even hear him take off.

"Leave him. We're after her right now." Fucking wannabe...

"Alright..." S.O.S. didn't sound to pleased with this.

"Leave Naruto alone, I'll kill you, if you touch him!" I snarled angrily, ramming my shoulder forward. It clipped someone's shoulder. I'm pretty sure it was the Sasuke-Wannabe... Good. I don't like him.

"Continue to resist, and I'll be forced to knock you out." The dick had the nerve to say that with a smirk in his tone.

"You wouldn't be forced to do anything asswhole, you'll do it willingly." I snarled angrily. That's like telling me not to be pissed that I'm being kidnapped! What the fuck man!

"Naiomi!" Help! Bless Naruto, bless his young soul! He actually listened... Is feeling he okay?

"This is troublesome Itachi. Can I kill them?" S.O.S. was really trying to piss me off... wasn't he?

"You touch them, I'll make you regret being born you over grown smurf!" My snarl was half way useless.

"You sure talk big for someone roped up right now." He snickered.

"You sure talk big for someone who looks uglier than my grandmothers ass." I retorted, shaking my head left in right tauntingly.

"You little-"

"Kisame. Let's go, we have the girl." Sasuke-Wannabe said this emotionless-ly.

"I'll have you know, that I am twenty-two- wait, no twenty-three, years of age. Call me a girl and I'll beat you to your mother and back." I growled when he hoisted me to my feet.

"My mother, is dead." He said it simply, like it didn't matter.

"My mother, is god knows where. Now kindly un-tie me so I can fuck you up." Cheerfully, I bounced slightly.

"You have a bad mouth." S.O.S. snickered at me.

"You have one fucked up face."

"Itachi!"

"Sasuke! Do you know this imposter! Tell your fan-girl to let go of me!" I turned my head in the direction of where his voice was.

"Ah, Sasuke-Kun. Have you gotten any stronger?" The smirk in his voice made me clench together and start shaking in anger.

"Leave him alone you creep!" I reared my foot up once again, but it hit air. I smirked, he'd let go of me.

Before anyone could blink, I jumped, tucking my arms under my legs and removing my blind fold.

I focused a steady gaze on the two of them as they scowled at me.

"You're proving to be very troublesome. Kisame, let's go, we'll come back for her later." With a flicker of my eye lids, they were gone.

"Who the hell were those dick weeds?" I demanded, crossing my arms and looking to the group for some answers.

"Members of the Akatsuki. Let's go, we're going to get you back home." Kakashi walked forward to where I stood, glaring into the forest.

"Does that one guy have an obsession with Sasuke or something?" I demanded. "Sasuke, if he stalks you, you let me know and I'll whoop his ass Jet Li style, you dig?"

"I'll take care of him myself." His eyes were narrowed, and Kakashi led me away as the other two tried to convince Sasuke to come back to my place. Unsuccessfully.

"Hey, hard ass." The Uchiha looked at me, and I flashed a small smile. "No one pulls off the Uchiha like you do."

A faint smirk crossed his lips and he sighed, following us back to the house. "Who was that ass anyway?"

"Itachi Uchiha. My older brother." Sasuke's eyes held a demonic hatred in them.

"Hatred is a fuel to only one thing. Self destruction. Or some crap like that. My grandpa had it on a fortune cookie once. But it's some pretty good advice I think." I smiled goofily at the young boy.

He rolled his eyes at me and came to walk beside us.

"You know something, we're a family you guys." I smiled, looking up at the sun. "Our very own tiny, little, dysfunctional family. And we're damn good lookin' too." I winked.

"We aren't related..." Naruto sweat dropped.

"Blood is only thicker than water." I fixed Naruto with a dirty look then. "I said we're a family bitch, be happy."

"What did we do to deserve you?" Kakashi smirked, down at me through his mask.

"Must've been pretty fuckin' awesome."

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><p><strong><em>AN: I totally ignored my mom when she told me to put duct-tape on my windows an hour ago. She sent my grandpa in here with a shot gun. I totally didn't ignore him._**

**_;)_**

**_So... I figure more people will review, if they have something to review FOR, so..._**

**_Name your WORST fear. Like... the type that'll make you hyperventilate and have mini panic attacks._**

**_Mine is the time 3-4 a.m., it's the hour of death, and I have a really bad expierience within that time where I had a mini panic attack... I was so scared. 0.0_**

**_I loveses you allses!_**


	8. Chapter 8: Water Torture?

**A/N: :D All the reviews! I love it!**

_**:**** I might just take your idea into consideration... be on the look out for that, because it will be fuckin' epic!**_

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><p><em><strong>Verdigurl:<strong>__** You will read and laugh! And that is scary... very scary. 0.o**_

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><p><em><strong>BLRLRLR PERRRRYYY :<strong>__** Thank you for the loveeee! And silence is a scary thing. A very scary thing. :(**_

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><p><em><strong>Storygirl11: <strong>__**We've already come to an... agreement. ;)**_

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><p><strong><em><span>Akumu:<span> Oh lord, if she knew the Uchiha background... poor Sasuke... poor, poor Sasuke. ;D_**

**_And you guess right. ;D She just laughed at them, then jacked the bells when they had him distracted. ;D_**

**_Death plays a big factor in all of my fears as well. :P Bad expieriances..._**

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><p><strong><em><span>Kuroryu Clan<span>: Itachi will be back! As well as the Sasuke-Wannabe and over grown Smurf insults! ;D_**

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><p><strong>Disclaimer!: <strong>

**Kakashi: Wtf? Where am I?**

**Halo: I got him right where I want him... *comes out of dark corner***

**Kakashi: Uh... hello? I'm right here, I can hear you.**

**Halo: Maybe you were supposed to...**

**Kakashi: Okay then... can you tell me where I am?**

**Halo: In the dark contours of my mind... my creative side.**

**Kakashi: Are you... drugged?**

**Halo: Nope! Alls well that ends well! I just need you to read this one little line off this paper, then I'll send you back!**

**Kakashi: Uh... okay? Halo-Less-Angel ...doesn't own Naruto... but she has... artifical (not real)... copy right to Kakashi's sexy body? Are you a fan girl?**

**Halo: Why yes. Yes I am. And I'm damn fucking proud of it, why you gotta problem?**

**Kakashi: Uh... no. Not at all.**

**Halo: Alright then! *Hugs the hottie* ;) buhbyee. Till next time my love!**

**Kakashi: Next time? _Love?_ Wait, where are you-**

***He gets swept up back to the Naruto world***

**Halo: *sniffles* He's so hot. ONWARD MY LOVES!**

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><p>I've managed to convince every person in Konaha besides the couple that knew my crazy antics that I'm from a place called Cybertron.<p>

It's all Kakashi's fault too.

He began talking about 'transformations' and I thought 'transformers', thus my addiction became notable.

Right now, I was starring down Sasuke, eyes narrowed. "Why won't you show me your optic's true fucking color?"

He groaned, throwing his hands in the air. "I don't have _optic's!_ I have _eyes!_"

I stood up and shoved a finger in his face. "You lie! Evil decepticon _creep_!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" He shouted back.

"I don't fraternize with decepticons. My spark is forever resting in the autobot Optimus Prime's servos." I crossed my arms cool-ly and turned away from the evil decepticon sparkling.

Sakura giggled when Kakashi began to grumble and glare at the air. That's when I struck.

Pulling out a rolling pin from the draw, I clocked Sasuke on the back of his head. "Die evil decepticon! Bitch get on the ground."

Kakashi stood and bear-hugged me from behind, pullingme back as I struggled. "Let me go Perv! I'm gonna kick his decepticon ass all the way into the Well of Sparks!"

"She finally lost it?" Team Guy begain making regular trips into my humble home, stopping in every day they weren't on a mission for lunch.

"Fellow Autobot! Help me kill the decepticon creep! What are you waiting for, _get him!_ Fine asswhole, I'll do it myself!" I pleaded, and when I got ne reply, snapped.

Tenten nodded her head affirmatively. "Yup. She lost it."

"I'm telling you, I'm an Autobot from the planet Cybertron! I live light-years away, and if you help me defeat this decepticreep, I'll be eternally in your debt!" I continued the useless struggle against Kakashi's iron muscles, wiggling around like a pinky finger in a ring a couple sizes to small.

"Look at me." I leaned my head back, starring straight up at the Copy-nin. "Your name is Naiomi. You're from the planet earth. You are a Konaha genin."

"My name is Nightstrike, I'm from the planet Cybertron, and I'm an Autobot under the leadership of the eternally majestic Optimus Prime." I corrected the noon-believer in a firm tone, starring up at him.

"You're 23 years old. You like to eat gingerbread men, and ramen. You have a bad attitude, and you take pride in your 'stupidity'." I starred up at him, narrowing my optics and going in for the kill.

"I'm a few millenia old, I can't eat, it'll screw up my systems, I have a cunning attitude, and I'm far from stupid."

"Your _human_."

"_Cybertronian_."

"Naiomi-Chan, enough with this!" He exclaimed.

"Chan?" Sakura smirked.

"He means Koi, he's just afraid to admit his undying love for me because I'm in love with a kick ass robot from outer space." I winked in her direction and she began giggling, then whispering to the decepticon.

"Naiomi, enough with the games! Everyone thinks you're from this 'Cybertron'! Do you realise with would happen if the council got ahold of this?" He turned me to face him, shaking me and almost yelling.

"... I'd have to explain myself to a bunch of geezers again?" My guess was accurate, as he nodded and pulled me to sit next to him on the couch.

Then, Sakura whispered to Tenten... "I wonder what their children will look like..."

The two of us turned red hot, and began exclaiming things that made no sense and were really just noises.

"It would be cute if they had his hair and her eyes..." Tenten gushed back and the two girls began gossiping on that topic.

"They'd have pretty strong kids, don't you think? The Copy-nin and her T.E.E.?" Naruto began.

"They'd be deadly if they had both of their abilities..." Sasuke agreed.

"I'd hate to see a child that powerful with her temper... Everyone in a ten mile radius would be dead." Neji stated. Now the girls had the boys gossiping?

"They talk about us like we aren't here..." I began, looking out of the corner of my eye.

"They are right though." He shrugged. "If we had a kid with your temper, and both of our abilities... everyone would be dead."

"But we aren't having kids." I pointed out.

He looked over at me with a glint in his eye, and I could tell there was a dirty smirk on his face. "You wanna start?"

I gave him a blank look and noticed everyone had stopped talking to listen to our conversation. "Sure, why not."

A shocked look crossed his face, but then he leaned back cockily. "I knew you couldn't resist me."

"Oh, I can resist you. It's just... the idea of stretch marks, swollen feet, and deranged mood swings sounds really good to me." Sakura and Tenten began giggling while the three boys snickered.

Kakashi sulked now, hunching forward and muttering things to himself.

"Naiomi-Nee, you're so mean to Kaka-Sensei!" Naruto laughed, walking into the kitchen. "Do you have any cookies made yet?"

"In the jar." I called back, patting Kakashi's back. "Sorry hun, my goodies are staying in the jar."

"Is it just me, or is there the smell of hot woman in here?" An unfamiliar voice rained in on my ear drums, and when I heard screaming from Sakura, I was very interested.

There was an old man, with really long white hair, and a new version of that pervy book in his hands, holding it out to Kakashi.

I smirked and ran forward, snatching the book and running out of the house. "I knew I smelt hot woman!" I heard his shout as I darted down the stairs using chakra.

"Naiomi!" Kakashi screamed, chasing after me as I darted around the city.

I glanced over my shoulder and watched as he used a jutsu, and two more of him appeared. I let out a loud laugh as I darted into an alley, scaling up the walls and hitting the roof tops.

People were watching with shocked looks on their faces as I evaded the Copy-nin. They didn't know I had his newest book in my bra.

"Why did I ever teach you to evade!" He shouted after me.

"Because I'm loveable!" I shouted back, laughing as the wind whipped my loose brown locks around my face.

"Trouble Kakashi-San?" A new face appeared behind me, a bit in front of Kakashi.

"She stole my book. It's a usual occurance, the city has only just been exposed to her when she steals it." He grumbled, speeding up.

It sucks for him that I'd been a track junkie and took daily jogs before, and after school. Not to mention I had wonderful stamina. "You ain't seen nuthin' yet!" I screeched, launching off the roof back onto the street, which was crowded.

"Henge no Jutsu!" I made the hand symbol and changed into an old woman.

I hobbled up the road, seeing the two men picking and combing through the crowd for me.

"Do you need help crossing, ma'am?" I looked and saw Kakashi eying me dirtily.

"No, no sonny. You just scadadle, go find yourself a pretty gal, and take her out to dinner, hmm?" I smiled and went to keep hobbling.

"No, I insist!" He grabbed my arm.

"I'll beat you with my cane sonny, I ain't that old!" I bellowed, reminding myself of my grandmother.

"M-my apologies ma'am, I thought you were someone else." He backed away slowly.

"I'll teach you to think I'm your Oba-San!" I screamed, raising my cane. He took off.

I put it down and hobbled back down the street, then when I was sure I wasn't being followed, switched out of the henge.

"Don't think your my Oba-San, huh?" I looked and saw Kakashi, the infamous smirking glint in his eye.

"You know, I think I should get a restraining order on you, following me around..." He lunged and I jumped up, running for one place- the hills.

I reached a lake and was about to run across it, when I was tackled to the ground. "Gotcha'!" Kakashi exclaimed in my ear.

"No!" I laughed, trying to get out of his grip, once again, unsucessfully.

I was under him, and our chests were flush against each other.

I was laughing as he took his book, but he continued to hold me to the ground, hovering above me.

When I calmed down slightly and looked into his eye, I saw something soft, and un-Kakashi like in the little brown iris.

I reached up and cupped his cheek in my palm with a smile, while he leaned his face into it and closed his eyes.

We sat like that for a few seconds, before he opened his eye, and I saw that the look I'd seen before had taken his entire eye over.

One of his hands reached up and pushed some loose strands of hair away from my eyes. His eyes flickered to my lips when the hair got caught on them and stopped, moving his hand to the small protrustions and softly pulling the hair away from them.

I found my lips curving into a smile, and I didn't have to tell them to. His eye crinkled slightly in his own version of a smile and he began to lean in. Just as our lips brushed in the slightest way, like a feather falling to the ground:

"Oh my god!" We jumped, cracking skulls, and I grunted when he fell on top of me.

"Ow..." He whined, resting his forehead in the crook of my neck.

"Sakura!" I looked and saw that girl from the day at the flower shop. The two began to fight while the others looked at us with smirks.

Well... Tenten was cooing and gushing to Neji who was smirking.

"So... Chinese water torture? Or hang them by their toes with tomatoe wire, and mercilessly tickle them with feathers?" He gave me one glance and I nodded. "Water torture it is."

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><p><strong>AN: The looooooove ;)**

**It's rainy outside. :P Gotta go to my cousin Melissa's.**

**I hate it when you get up and walk for a couple seconds, then you get hit with a dizzy spell...**

**My grandma tripped me one time because of it. And they get worse!**

**NEW QUESTION!**

**If you could borrow one Naruto character from the manga, who would it be and why?**

**Mine would be Kakashi. For... personal reasons. ;) jkjk, just to sit and figure some stuff out about his character to make him easier to write dammit!**

**Well, review my loves!**


	9. Chapter 9: Dreaming!

**A/N: Hello dearly beloved... I'm sorry that my update is super-duper extra late... but I have horrible news.**

**I've... started school.**

**Dun dun duuuuuuun.**

**I'm afraid all, if not most, of my updates will be that far apart... until Christmas. Hopefully. I _may _be getting my new laptop then, because you all know I'm a spaz and spilt iced tea on my mini... 0.o.**

**But, I will begin to write the next chapter now! The next time I have access to a computer, or I'm home sick again, I will update it for you!**

**All my love-**

**~Halo**

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><p><strong>And now, for my lovely thank you's!<strong>

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><p><em><strong>Akumu: <strong>_**My lovely! I'm glad you were laughing... ;D Ah... Chinese Water Torture... you strap a person to a chair in a spill proof box, and let water slowly drip onto them, filling the box and eventually killing the person... ;)**

**And both of your reasons are very much so vaild. I loooove it. ;)**

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><p><em><strong>Psychotic Rose:<strong>_** Haha, the transformers bit was a personal favorite as well... xD I'm glad the kiss was worth the wait... :D I guess I did forget to mention that... but it was Asuma! And yes... Kimimaru is very hot. That he is.**

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><p><em><strong>XDeasilyamused <strong>_**: If you're easily amused, this will have you cracking up like me... Quacking keybords! ROTFL! Some kiddy show just said it and I was DYING!**

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><p><em><strong>xScarletNightx: <strong>_**First off, honey, we don't collide with walls... walls collide with us. ;D AAwe! Your review made my day! Now we're equal!**

**Your answer is of course on point. Naruto is rapeable. So is Kakashi. And so is Sasuke... he's just off his f*ckin' rocker! I've also got personal reasons under my belt... ;D**

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><p><em><strong>Storygirl11:<strong>_** For some cracked out reason... I had difficulties typing your name... 0.o don't ask... Any time girl!**

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><p><strong>And again, another thanks to all you quiet readers! Feel free to just post an LMFAO! I'll think of something to say back... ;)<strong>

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><p>I was copping an attitued, and I knew it.<p>

And not a nice one either.

"Fuck you." Kakashi looked at me shocked, while the others sighed.

"She's been like this all week." Naruto explained.

"Naiomi-Chan, what's-"

"Go away." I tried to walk away from them, but they continued to follow me. Fuckers.

"Naiomi, where are you-"

"Leave me alone."

"I think this is a girl thing." And boy was Sakura right. My 'Aunt Flo' was visiting. And I felt like I was getting stabbed with kunai in my lower stomach, over, and over, and _over _again.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Naruto exclaimed, throwing his hands into the air and glowering at the side of the road.

A look of understanding crossed Kakashi's face, and he looked rather akward. I rolled my eyes and walked faster.

"... is it?" He asked.

I froze, then turned, giving him the dirtiest look I could muster up. "I don't see how that's any of your buisness."

"Yup. It is." Sakura nodded.

"Sakura!" I whined, my eyes filling with tears.

They all eyed me, scared. "**That's my personal buisness!**"

"Yeah... that sounds like the monthly-"

Kakashi never finished that sentence. Why? I punched him in the face. "**Finish that sentence! I fucking **_dare _**you!**"

I was breathing hard from screaming, and everyone was watching me in shock.

A thought came to mind... and I just had to say it. "Don't get me angry... you won't like me, when I'm angry."

"We don't like you now." C.B. smirked at me. That's it. I'm angry.

"**Come here you little fucking prick! I'm gonna rip your hair off your head, and put it back on that chickens ass! Where it fucking belongs! Then I'm gonna cut your head off your shoulders and mount it on my wall! Your body will become a fucking **_throw rug_ **in my living room!**" I hadn't even realised something was around my eyes I was glaring so hard.

"Control your Onna Sensei!" Three pairs of retreating foot-steps.

"Naiomi-Chan, please calm down so I can un-cover your eyes." There was no more wind, and when I was backed up, my legs hit the familiar feeling of my couch.

I sniffled, then began to out right cry. "E-everybody _hates _me!"

"What? Naiomi, nobody hates you!" My eyes were exposed to the light.

"You _left_ me!" I cried, hitting his arm roughly.

"What are you talking about?" He grabbed my hands, trying to stop the on-slaught of punches I was hitting him with.

"You-You _kissed _me in that clearing by the lake, didn't even bother to _explain_ yourself, and then you _left _for a _week!_" I sniffled, pushing him while he held my wrist close to him.

"I went on a mission, I didn't leave you." He said calmly, moving his hands down to my own.

"Well you didn't tell me about it!" I whined, trying to pull my hands back.

"I left a note in your bedside table..." He said simply, pulling me closer to him.

"You _know _I never go in there!" I tried to pull further away from him as he drew me into his arms.

"I'm sorry, I would have told you in person, but you were asleep." He shrugged, and I snivled, looking up at him angrily.

"You could have _woke me up!_" I exclaimed, slapping my hands to his chest.

"But you looked so peaceful... like an angel... a very... sexy angel." My cheeks flamed and I looked at him with disdain.

"You pervert! You know I only sleep in t-shirts and underware!" I hit his chest repeatedly, trying to get him to let go.

"Which was a threat to the two boys not to wake you up. I obviously love the way that looks on you." Once again, there was a smirk in his tone.

With that said I began to outright sob.

"What? What did I say?" He cried out, pulling me closer to him.

"I'm... I'm I don't know what, but I'm in something with a _pervert!_" My wail made him cringe.

"What do you mean we're in something?" His question made me continuously sob and start beating on his chest again.

"**You don't even **_remember!_" I put little burst of chakra into my pounding and he gripped my hands once again to stop me from hitting him.

"I do remember! What do you mean something!" He demanded, starring into my eye.

"Never mind!" I turned my back to him and he sighed.

"Are you always this bad? During... you know?" I felt his un-clothed finger tips on my neck, pushing my hair all to my left shoulder.

"Yes. I am." I huffed, sniffling and crossing my arms.

He began to say something, but I ignored him, crossing my arms and looking everywhere but him.

"-Koi. I'm sorry if you're mad at me-"

"Wait, wait, what did you just say?" I looked at him over my shoulder, realising for the first time that his head was on my shoulder. My nose brushed against his own clothed one.

"I said I had to go on a mission the Hokage called me away for."

"No, no, after that." Our noses were still touching and he whipped the tears off of my face.

"I said I'm sorry if you're mad at me."

"Before that, and after the first part!" I cried out, turning to face him.

"...I asked, are you mad at me Naiomi-Chan." He hesitated to talk to me, and I pouted.

"Oh... never mind, I heard you wrong." I felt so... dejected.

"What did you think you heard?" He questioned, drawing on my cheek with his finger.

"Nothing, it's not important." I trailed off, turning so his finger was touching my jaw.

"These mood swings you have are really horrible." His tone was blunt.

"Stop causing them then." I snapped, glaring at the wall.

"What did I do?" He pleaded.

"You _kissed me_!" I screeched, punching his leg.

"You kissed me back!" He exclaimed, gripping my fist and prying it open.

"W-Well what do you expect! You kissed me!" Suddenly, my back was hitting the couch, and the silver haired Jounin was hovering over me.

"With your attitued, I expected to get punched, but figured what the hell." He was looking through my eyes and I struggled, trying to sit up.

"Kakashi, you're going to make me ruin my couch!" He smiled with his eye before pulling me to sit up.

"Sorry Naiomi-K-Chan." I raised an eye brow at him, watching as he became slightly flustered.

"Would you just spit it out." I grumbled.

"What?"

"That you don't want anything to do with me anymore." I turned my head away from him, looking at the healthy bonsai tree's sitting on my windowsill.

"Why would you think that?"

"You keep avoiding my questions!"

"I'm not avoiding your-"

"**Then fucking **_answer_ **them!**" I screeched. I felt the pain of rejection deep in the pit of my belly. Like a lion, waiting to be released... and then terrorizing.

"Well what questions do you have! Everything you asked was indirect, and you started screaming before I could answer you!" Semi-gloved hands went up in the air, a look of discontent on the jounin's face.

"Never mind. I don't want to pressure you." I gloated, turning my back to him and huffing.

"No, that's not how it works. You're going to answer me." He turned me around to once again face him.

"Why did you kiss me then? Huh?" I sneered, giving him dirty looks.

"I thought it would have been obvious by now." It sounded like he was confessing, while he scratched the back of his neck.

"What's that supposed to mean!" I exclaimed, my hands now flying into the air.

"Well... that I... well, it's kind of... I, uh...l-"

"Omi-Chan! Oh, hi Kakashi-San!" My neighbor, a seventeen year old Chunnin officer, came into my living room.

"Sumenai-Kun." Kakashi seemed... shot down. I'm the one that should be shot down, he won't give me a god damn straight answer!

"How the hell did you get in here?" I demanded, giving him my vicsous vibe.

"Locked doors aren't a problem for a ninja." He smirked.

"What about flying fists?" I smirked.

"Oh... w-well... I just wanted to know if you would come to this party with me later b-but..."

"I'm really not having a good day Sumenai, maybe next time?"

"O-Oh... okay. Next time!" He smiled and left.

"Fucking kid." I grumbled when he was gone. "Now what were you saying?"

"I-it's nothing... don't worry about-"

"Listen up, and listen good. Spill the beans or I'll spill your guts." I poked him, narrowing my eyes dangerously.

"W-Well... I was saying... that I uh... li-iike to train with you!" He exclaimed, giving me an eye smile.

"G-t-f-o."

"What?"

"I want. The _truth_."

"Okay, okay... I kissed you because... well... I... I really... I-uh... Ilikeyou."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Say that last part again?"

"Ilikeyou?"

"Slower..."

"I... Like you."

A happy smile lit up my face. "Oh, I like you too!"

"I mean... _like_ like you." He scratched the back of his neck.

Tears came to my eyes, and I threw myself at him, crying happily.

"W-Why are you crying!"

"Cause I'm happy! Just shut up and hug me dick hole!"

He complied with my demand, and I felt a happy vibe beating through my heart...

Then the sun, began to blare in my eyes.

"Shit..." I sat up, rubbing my eyes and kicking off my covers. "It was just a dream..."

It was sunday morning, the week _after_ 'Aunt Flo' had made her visit... I always have odd dreams right after I menstrate.

I put my feet on the floor, my big t-shirt falling to just under my ass. My hair was wild, sticking up in every which way...I could feel it.

"Omi-Nee? You awake?" Naruto knocked on my door, still not quite happy with looking at me when I first wake up.

"Yeah. Just let me get ready. I'll be at Ichiraku's in a half an hour." I got a mumbled 'okay' in response as I walked into my bathroom.

I just had to stub my fucking toe.

"**Shit! Ouch mother fucker, that fucking **_hurt_!" I hopped around, then fell onto my ass...

Not only were my wishes shoved into my face, but now my toe and ass were throbbing... well, isn't this going to be a good day...

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><p><strong>AN: So... I have a secret. I don't really like this chapter. :P To many mood swings.**

**Any way... My brother and cousin are watching some show, and this fucking creepy ass mouse scared me. D'x**

**For your question...**

Who is your absolute _favorite _character in Naruto? Only one person aloud!

** My favorite character would be Kakashi. 'Cause he's hot. And I love him.;)**

**I LOVE YOU AALLLLL!**


	10. Chapter 10: Concerto!

**A/N: Alls I gotta say is... you're all going to kill me. Not kindly either... ;D**

**Thank you's? I'm gonna skip the notes, sorry guys. :( I wrote them, then my uncles computer died. So they all died. :P**

**First this thing... that I forgot last chapter. .**

**I own NOTHINGGGGGGG!**

**Okay... I'm good.**

**Thanks to: Storygirl11, Verdigurl, Psychotic Rose, Akumu, TheIcecreamGeek, and blondiesurfiechick!**

** ^^  
>l l<br>I do remember this from your response though... c(;{D - his name is Pueblo! He's gotta Mooo-Stache! And a sumbrero! WOOT!**

**All your answers to the question were amazing! Another one lies at the bottom!**

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><p>After all the misfortune of the mornings horror, I was in a wicked mood...<p>

Teasing and taunting came to me naturally... imagine the insults I come up with when I actually _try_.

"You must use alot of cover up when you show your face." I had an arm resting on the silver haired Jounin's shoulder, starring up at him.

"What?"

"I mean, you're pale enough with what we can see... It makes a girl wonder how white the rest of your face is. Probably as white as baby powder, or somebodies ass..." He raised an eye brow at me, trying to decipher why I was being extra irritting today.

"I'll have you know my face is the same color." He repriamended, giving me a stern gaze with his good eye.

"Alright, alright. So... what type of baby powder do you use to keep it the same color?" I grinned up at him.

Sakura giggled, Naruto flat out broke out laughing, and even C.B. cracked a smirk.

"Why do I bother?" He sighed, looking up to the sky.

"'Cause... I'm awesome." I smiled up at him cheekily, before tripping a teen who was flirting with some guy on the sidewalk.

"Are you sure you aren't evil?" He demanded, giving me a stern gaze.

"Positive. What 'bout you?" I winked up at him.

"Kakashi-Kun!" I turned, and froze... it was the army...

"Oh no..." Naruto went wide eyed.

"It's..."

"His fangirls..." Sasuke finished, looking honestly scared.

"Woot! Bitches, I own him now, find someone else!" I formed a hand symbol and the others grabbed onto me.

"Substitution no Jutsu!" With a huge puff of smoke, we were replaced with a log.

We ended up in my kitchen.

There was even silence for a bit.

"So... you wanna make us lunch?" Naruto grinned.

"... Fine. But only because I'm hungry. Now, all of you get out of my kitchen." I hate having people in the kitchen with me when I'm cooking. I tend to sing, and I'm tone deaf... literally.

At first it was gentle humming, pouring hot water from the sink into a pot.

Then, when I put the seasonings, followed by the noodles, into the pot after the water boiled, things got pretty hard core.

I'm talking head banging, microphone, air guitar's... the whole bit.

'Can you feel it crush you, does it seem to bring the worst in you out. There's no running away from these things that hold you down. Do they complicate you because they make you feel like this? Of all the colors that you've shined this is surely not your best.' I jumped in front of the noodles, stirring them then resumed singing.

After the song ended, in my head, there was clapping. I jumped, chucking my spoon with a scream. Thankfully, Kakashi caught it.

"Whoa. You scared me..." He handed me back the spoon, and Naruto poked his head back in.

"Are the animal's dead yet?"

"**Little prick!**" I screamed, throwing my spoon head on at him. Lucky for him, he dodged it and it hit the wall, leaving a hole, and the spoon in it.

"It wasn't... that bad." I gave him a dirty look and he winced. "Well, then I suppose it's a good thing you're a ninja?"

"Thanks." I huffed, stirring the noodles. "Makes me feel so much better."

"You can't be good at... well, uh... some things?"

"Fuck you."

"We've been through this."

"Pervert."

"We've been through this as well."

"Do you live to make my life difficult?" I groaned, pulling the spoon from the wall and putting it in the sink to run it under warm water. Then I put it back in the pot to continue cooking.

"No... more like... pleasureable." He put his hands on my hips and rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Oh really?" I snickered, looking at him over my shoulder. Our noses brushed and he puckered his lips, catching my own in a tempting kiss. He didn't even take his mask off...

"Hey! Stop making out unless Kaka-Sensei is gonna take off his mask, and make us food!" Naruto shouted, huffing and puffing in the door way.

"Naruto! Idiot, let them have their moment!" Sakura punched him in the head...

"Hn." He's still hooked on his caveanese...

Kakashi sighed, then turned to glare full force at his students. "Why is it always one of you ruining our moments?"

Sakura squealed, getting a dreamy look in her eyes.

"Do you kids want to eat?" I growled. They squeaked and ran into the living room.

"That's how it's done. Foo." I smirked at him.

"Once again... the words exiting your mouth." He chuckled, and I decided to be cheeky, kissing his nose.

"Stop being cute." He snickered, and I rolled my eyes.

"Let me cook before the noodles burn."

"Yes ma'am." He saluted me, pulling away to lean on the door way.

Soon, we were seated at the table, making me wonder... what exactly _were _Kakashi and I? Lovers? Friends with... benefits? Hell no. I refuse that. Or were we just emotionally confused...

Time will tell.

For now, I'm perfectly content not knowing... it's fucking scarier than the thought of getting fleas...

And my personal rock concert was once again, alive.

"**So what if you can see, the darker side of me! No one would ever change this animal I have become**!" I banged my head around, hiked my foot up onto a chair and leaned forward.

Mufasa whimpered, covering his furry animal ears.

"**Help me believe, it's not the real me, somebody help me tame this animal I have become! Help me believe, it's not the real me, somebody help me tame this animal!"** I jumped in the air, bending my left leg back and kicking my right one forward**. "Sombody help me through this nightmare**!"

I stopped singing, to hum as I cooked.

But then, my 'i-head' switched songs.

"**I might be to strung out on compliaments, over dosed on confadence.  
>Started not to give a fuck an stop fearin' the consequence.<br>Drinkin' every night, 'cause we drink to my acomplishments, faded way to long I'm floatin' in an out of conciousness,  
>and they sayin' I'm back, I'd agree with that,<br>I just take my time in all this shit, still believe in that**." Now, my head banging turned into the bobbing of a rapper.

"**I had someone tell me I fell off, ooh I needed that.  
>An they wanna see me pick back up well where I leave that at?<br>I know I exagerrated things, now I got it like that,  
>tuck my napkin in my shirt 'cause I'm just mobbin' like that.<br>You know good an well that you don't want a problem like that,  
>you gon' make someone around me catch a body like that.<br>Oh, don't do it, please don't do it.  
>'Cause one of us go in, an we all go through it.<br>Drizzy got the money, so Drizzy gon' pay it,  
>those my brothers I ain't even gotta say it,<br>that's just somethin' they know**." I bounded around the kitchen, salting the noodles, stirring them and just... being myself. It feels nice to be able to do this again.

But then, being the... Idiot that I am... I fell, and cracked my skull on the corner of my kitchen table...

My name was called while I felt utterly dizzy, like I was under a wave in the ocean.

But then, I was greeted with pain. Unimaginable, horrible, pain.

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><p><strong>AN: So... my grandma bought ice cream.. I screamed like a banshee, ate it all... then threw up. ;D **

**It tasted good... while it lasted. :P**

**Le Domande` da oggi`! (The question of the day!)**

_If you were stuck for _ever!_ with one member of Akatsuki, who would you choose! Why? And finally, the conditions! You can't be more than ten-feet apart, they keep all their abilities, and if you die, they die- vice versa as well-. PICK AWAY!_

**I would choose Itachi. 'Cause he's hot. And he's cool. And he's hot. And he's smart. And he can go all mengeko sharingan on all the people who piss me off... ^.^ Plus, he's my second favorite character in the series. :D**


	11. Chapter 11: Read the AN please!

**A/N: You're all going to hate me... then love me. ;D**

**Surprisingly... this is the last chapter of this story. ... WHOA, PUT THOSE AWAY!**

**Kakashi: Wtf? What do you mean this is the last chapter? There's no SMUT!**

**Me: ... Stfu. Before I stone you and drag you through Rome naked.**

**Naruto: Adults/Teens are... really wierd.**

**Sakura: No duh idiot!**

**Me: LEAVE NARU-KUN ALONE BITCH!**

**Everyone: *Sweatdrops***

**Now, as I was SAYING! This is the last chapter. But... if I get at least six reviews I'll post a sequel... if not... you'll go one forever wondering what happens next...**

**Kakashi: And there will be smut!**

**Me: Yeah, sure, what ever floats your boat.**

**Kakashi: FIST BUMP!**

**Me: *Whispers* There won't be any smut. But if you'd like to read the smutty -cut out for younger viewers- parts, just let me know in a review and I'll send it. BUT YOU NEEDA REVIEW!**

**I'm still working on obtaining Naruto...**

**xScarletNightx: Naiomi is Epic... we're all epic... except SasuSaku fans... they're smoking something hot thinking of those to crack-packets getting together...;D I don't hold in my laughter anymore... no one questions my antics, because I told my teacher I was day dreaming of cutting him up like a cantelope... **

**AND I LOVE YOU! YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL BRAIN! Itachi is frigginnnnn hoooooooottttt. ;D**

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><p><strong>Storygirl11: They cute, they cute. ;)<strong>

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><p><strong>Akumu:HEELLLLSSS YEH! You know it.<strong>

**And I like Itachi ( obviously ) and Konan is cool. ;D She seems like a fun person to hang with...**

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><p>Pain. That's all I felt.<p>

In my ribs, in my chest, in my stomach, my legs, my arms... just... _everywhere_.

There were sirens blaring in my ears, lights of all colors flaring in my vision. It took me all of twenty minutes to realise through my screams of bloody murder, that I was back in Japan.

Away from Naruto. Away from Sasuke. Away from Sakura. Away from Kakashi.

Now, there was pain in my heart.

My screams of agony turned into cries of horror. I was away from home. Away from my heart.

"No!" I screamed as they lifted me onto the stretcher.

"Ma'am, you need to be taken to the hospital!" The Emt strapped me down, sedating me. My head was filled with disaster.

"Kill me..." I whispered, before once again closing my eyes.

I woke to the feeling of something stroking my head. My mother. I could recognise her soft touch and scent. "M-mom?" I fluttered open my eye lids. My body felt numb, heavy... I couldn't feel the pain.

"Oh, Naiomi Rakurai Watanabe! How much more irrisponsible could you get! Walking in the middle of the street? Were you trying to commit suicide?" She grabbed my face, starring into my eyes. "Your eyes... they're black... What happened to the pigments in your eyes?" My eyes were bi-polar. It's nothing new.

"Mom... they always change. Let go of my face." My voice was hoarse, depressed... everything I felt was reflected in the raw tone.

"Honey... what's the matter?" She demanded.

"I... I don't want to talk about it." I turned my head away from her.

"Naiomi, tell me!" She exclaimed, making me look at her.

"It's nothing mom, don't worry about it." I snapped, fixing her with a glare.

She let out a scream of pain and dropped to the floor. My eyes widened. "Shit! Mom! Mom, are you okay?"

"W-What... what the fuck was that Naiomi? Dammit, what happened to you? Where's _my _daughter?" She screamed into my face, glaring back at me.

The hurt in my heart increased. "Maybe she'd still be here if you were a better mother." I snapped, glaring at the window.

I didn't miss the gasp of horror, or the tremble in her tone. "Dammit Naiomi! Every fucking time! It always ends up like this! I haven't seen you in _months_!"

"What difference does it make?" I snapped, turning my gaze to her, very careful to keep it blank so I wouldn't hurt her.

"Why are you like this? What have I ever done to you?" She pleaded, grabbing my hand.

"I'm leaving. I don't want to be alone all the time mother. I'm moving to Okinawa. I'm going to help out with the shop, like I should have." I snapped. Lifting my arms was a difficult task, but I managed to do it.

Making the required hand symbols, I pushed the chakra throughout my body, healing the damage in a painful but efficient way.

After ten minutes, I dubbed myself ready to go and sat up. My mother eyed me in horror. While my joints were still sore, it wasn't a task to stand.

"Naiomi Rakurai, you sit down this instant! You were just hit by a car!" She screamed, trying to push me down to once again sit on the bed. Her normal strength made me laugh. I'm a fucking Genin, no chakra-deprived bitch was going to be pushing me anywhere.

"Good-bye mother." I used the trnsporttion jutsu, landing in my room.

Putting cloths in a suit case, then taking a pair of sweats and a black wife beater from my draw, following with a black bra and thong. I pulled the cloths on, then transported to Okinawa.

I ended up in my grandmothers kitchen, and she stared at me in shock. "Naiomi-Chan... when did you get here?"

"Uh... yesterday?" I smiled, tilting my head.

"Ah... young kids. Welcome home dear! Now maybe those little brats will stop ruining my rose bushes." She smiled, tilting her head.

I smirked, pounding my fist into my palm. "Just show me their faces gram. I'll knock a few heads."

"I know you will. i just don't want you to accidentally kill anybody." She called over her shoulder.

I looked to the small kitchen table. There were fresh cookies on it, with a bonsai tree as the center piece. "Ba-Chan, I'm just going to put these in on my bedroom floor. Okay?"

"Yes, yes. You go unpack. I'll have dinner ready by then." She began to mumble in japanese, moving around the kitchen.

I walked through the house, sliding my bedroom door open. This room spoke more of my personality than my other one did. If you can hear my sarcasm, your ears are working.

Traditional wooden floors, walls, and ceilings. The front wall with my door was all paper.

There were oil candles, you know, the porcelin tower like thing with a candle in the bottom chamber that heats scented oil, casting off a jasmine fragrance... A few scrolls were on my walls, hand made paintings, prescious photos... It was a relaxing place, my place of zen.

I pulled open the draws of my dresser, filling them with my cloths.

"Ba-Chan? Do you need help?" I walked into the kitchen. My heart felt... empty.

"No." She looked at me warily. "Naiomi Rakurai, is that heartbreak in your eyes?"

I looked into my grandma's face, and her eyes softened. "It is, isn't it? Tell me everything."

And so I did. And I was in tears an hour later, our food cold and forgotten on the table.

"Everything happens... for a reason Naiomi-Chan. If it was ment to be, you will get him back. Do not cry tigeress." She pulled me into one of her hugs and I snivled.

Elvis Presly's Heartbreak Hotel began to play in the back round, and my sobs went un-restrained.

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><p><strong>AN: So sad... D':**

**I just watch some girls beat the shit out of Spongebob on the News... alls I gotta say is...**

**FUCK THE FREE WORLD!**

**XD**

**Your question?**

_Your favorite Naruto character is bed-ridden for three weeks after extreme exhaustion occurs! He calls you in (no matter how unlikely) to take care of him. Your response?_

**Heh... heh heh heh... Sure... say, Kakashi do you still have that rope? And those chains?**

**I LOVE YOU ALL!**


	12. Chapter 12: WILL BE DELETED!

**A/N: It's here... what I've been threatened over, pleaded to over, and screamed at over...**

**THE SEQUEL!**

**It's on my lovely profile! ^.***

**Click on my screen name, scroll all the way down, and click on the lovely tab labled 'When You See Too Much...'**

**I won't post a summary here, because I'm too lazy. **

**ALSO! I have an Itachi/Oc story up as well... but I forgot the title. It's the other one... that's not finished! xD Oh, Oh! I know, I know! It's Too Many Secrets! So if you're interested in that, check it out!**

**Also... I'll be posting a poll bitches... ( don't be offended, I call my mother my bitch. jkjk, but it's a term of endearment coming from me) On wether or not I should also write a DELETED SCENES portion of I.O.W.C.S and W.Y.S.T.M (This story and the sequel) SO go vote on that!**

**Now, I'm going to go write some more because I'm a slave basically... NOW DO AS YOU WERE TOLD LOVES!**

**:D**


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